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  • Thursday, 4th December 08

whatawasteoftime News Comments (210)

Grandmaster Flash to release first album in over 20 years

The album features guests appearances from Q-Tip and Busta Rhymes

Thu 04 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

It pains me to say it but judging by how shit every other once-great hip hop artists' new albums have been over the last couple of years, this is likely to be bloody awful.

Thu 04 Dec, 2008

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Leona Lewis' Snow Patrol cover breaks download record

The singer's version of 'Run' has been downloaded around 70,000 times

Thu 04 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

"The singer's version of 'Run' has been downloaded around 70,000 times" - and thrown away 69,950 times

Thu 04 Dec, 2008

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Tony Wilson honoured by Manchester Council

The Factory Records mogul has been given the freedom of the city posthumously

Thu 04 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

With the greatest of respect that's not going to do him much fucking good is it.

Thu 04 Dec, 2008

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UNKLE to release new album this month

The album will feature reworkings of older tracks plus newies

Wed 03 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

Psyence Fiction was great but everything they've done since has been instantly forgettable, slightly po-faced dance/rock tedium.

Wed 03 Dec, 2008

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Amy Winehouse's husband Blake Fielder-Civil sent back to prison

Star's spouse reported to have broken out of rehab

Wed 03 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

What an utter cunt

Wed 03 Dec, 2008

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Morrissey reveals new 'baby' faced album sleeve

Check out the cover art for 'Years Of Refusal' on NME.COM

Wed 03 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

That's fucking weird

Wed 03 Dec, 2008

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Akon 'fan tossing' trial postponed

Rapper will now appear on December 17 in Fishkill, NY

Tue 02 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

Akunt

Wed 03 Dec, 2008

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Pigeon Detectives cancel tour dates

Singer Matt Bowman is struck down with chest infection

Tue 02 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

Finally some good news!

Tue 02 Dec, 2008

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Ting Tings set to write new album in Paris

Duo are planning to use a brass section on their new record

Tue 02 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

They really do suck colossal balls

Tue 02 Dec, 2008

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Axl Rose blamed for 'poor' Guns N' Roses comeback - Daily Gossip

Oasis, Alex Turner, Lily Allen – your music gossip stop

Tue 02 Dec, 2008

Comments (2)

It couldn't be because the GnR album is embarrassingly weak shite? Naah, that couldn't possibly be the case.

Tue 02 Dec, 2008

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MySpace accused of stealing band's URL

Argument breaks out after MySpace gives band no choice in the matter

Mon 01 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

MySpace are way more arrogant than their shit website gives them a right to be

Mon 01 Dec, 2008

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Emergency deliveries for new Take That and Britney Spears albums

Collapse of delivery firm forces retailers to use alternatives

Mon 01 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

The fact that these shitty albums weren't going to make it to the shops was the only good thing that came out of Woolies' collapse.

Mon 01 Dec, 2008

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Didier Drogba and Nicolas Anelka banned from partying with Lil' Wayne/Akon

Footballers not allowed to travel to USA for hip-hop bash

Mon 01 Dec, 2008

Comments (1)

That's a lucky escape for those footballers then. Imagine being subjected to the fucking shite that these wankers pass off as music. Akon? Akunt more like.

Mon 01 Dec, 2008

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London Metro club to shut due to Crossrail

Venue to shut its doors for last time in January

Fri 28 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

"The venue, which has hosted acts such as Klaxons, J Mascis and Courtney Love"?Sounds like a proper cuntfest.

Mon 01 Dec, 2008

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Bob Geldof juggles poverty summit with Margate's Xmas lights

Live8 man will flick switch then jet to Qatar

Thu 27 Nov, 2008

Comments (2)

He really is the most talentless, tedious prick. Just remind us again what you're supposed to be famous for Bob, apart from being a great self-publicist?

Thu 27 Nov, 2008

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Guns N' Roses lawyer says Dr Pepper failed on free drinks

Alan Gutman accuses drinks company of 'unmitigated disaster'

Thu 27 Nov, 2008

Comments (2)

Anything that distracts attention away from your fucking terrible album eh lads?

Thu 27 Nov, 2008

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Akon for intimate free show in New York

He'll perform this Monday at the China Club

Wed 26 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

I'd pay good money NOT to have to listen to this unbearable, goblin-faced twat and his utterly shit attempts at music.

Thu 27 Nov, 2008

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China says 'Guns N' Roses' 'Chinese Democracy' is venomous'

State newspaper condemns Axl Rose's gang

Tue 25 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

It IS venomous! Have you heard it? Fucking torture...

Wed 26 Nov, 2008

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Guns N' Roses release 'Chinese Democracy' early with cycling army

Advance copies are released a day early

Mon 24 Nov, 2008

Comments (2)

All this bullshit for a fuckin terrible album that's been on bittorrent for weeks... Yawn. Surely there must be better things to spend their money on?

Mon 24 Nov, 2008

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Blink-182's Travis Barker sues after plane crash

The drummer is seeking damages from two companies

Sat 22 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Can we sue him for the dismal music he inflicts on the world?

Sun 23 Nov, 2008

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Take That 'write a song about Amy Winehouse'

'How Did It Come To This' will be on the band's new album

Thu 20 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Take That Big Bag of Heroin

Fri 21 Nov, 2008

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TV On The Radio watched by Bat For Lashes and Klaxons in London

US band play sold-out show in UK capital

Thu 20 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Does this count as news now? Members of one shit band watch another shit band? Jesus Christ...

Thu 20 Nov, 2008

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Hear Guns N' Roses' 'Chinese Democracy' early

Axl Rose and co preview album online

Thu 20 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

17 years to make, 2 minutes to download off bittorrent, five minutes of laughing then one second to bin it. What a joke this album is...

Thu 20 Nov, 2008

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Rage Against The Machine's 'Killing In The Name' sparks Asda furore

The song is played in a branch of the shop in Preston

Wed 19 Nov, 2008

Comments (2)

This is the most interesting thing that will EVER happen in a branch of ASDA. They should be grateful.

Wed 19 Nov, 2008

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Gary Glitter's band working on comeback album

Backing band say they could return without disgraced frontman

Mon 17 Nov, 2008

Comments (3)

They must be pretty fucking desperate to want to be associated in any way with this vile cunt.

Mon 17 Nov, 2008

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Kanye West: 'MTV Europe Music Awards were fixed'

Rapper says he only won because he turned up

Thu 13 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

This vapid cunt has fame and money and he still whinges like a bitch all the fucking time. What a nobhead.

Thu 13 Nov, 2008

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Razorlight's Johnny Borrell fed up of the 'flak' he's getting

Singer is angry his new album hasn't been given a chance

Thu 13 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

I wonder if he's considered not being such an arrogant, talentless, tramp-looking donkey fucker as a possible solution to this alleged problem?

Thu 13 Nov, 2008

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'Hollyoaks' band release 'real' single

Dirty Diegos debut is out this month

Wed 12 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Jesus wept, this is the shittest thing in the history of an already pretty damn shitty universe. They should stick to acting like twats on TV, these wankers.

Wed 12 Nov, 2008

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Guns N' Roses leaker to plead guilty

Kevin Cogill changes his plea to strike a deal

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

Comments (2)

They should take themselves to court for making such a laughably pathetic, piss poor record.

Wed 12 Nov, 2008

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'X Factor' Laura White controversy: Louis Walsh stands by decision

TV judge says he does not regret his controversial decision

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Soundedd is demonstrating his usual illiterate wank stylings... learn to spell. Get a basic education you fuck bucket. And Louis Walsh is a pointless, goblin faced cunt as well.

Wed 12 Nov, 2008

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Antony and the Johnsons announce release date of new album

'The Crying Light' set to hit shops early in 2009

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

He is a berk now. Shit, wailing wanker. Needs to fuck off and shut up ASAP.

Wed 12 Nov, 2008

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Eminem's new album 'Relapse' now set for 2009 release

A source suggests the album won't be out this year

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

More like Prolapse

Wed 12 Nov, 2008

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Peter Gabriel 'free' music service launches today (Nov 11)

Music from Kings Of Leon, Pink and Nickelback available now

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

I'd pay money NOT to have to listen to acts including Kings Of Leon, Pink, Nickelback and Estelle. What a bunch of old shite.

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

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Grace Jones documentary on the way

The singer/actress has been filmed for the past few years

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

Comments (3)

Will it offer any insights into why we should give a shit? Cos she's the most overrated human in existence.

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

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Guns N' Roses launch 'Chinese Democracy' air guitar competition

Winners will get to hear new album early

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

Comments (3)

Shit band, shitter album!

Tue 11 Nov, 2008

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Prince forced to pay $58,000 to video editor

Purple One was sued for unreturned equipment and non-pay

Fri 07 Nov, 2008

Comments (2)

Good, it's about time this ludicrous midget was given something else to do than aggressively pursuing people on YouTube for extremely tenuous "copyright violations". Talentless little berk with small man syndrome.

Sat 08 Nov, 2008

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Radiohead's Thom Yorke releases Barack Obama celebration song

The track is available to download now

Thu 06 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Soundedd, you bore me massively you fucking berk.

Fri 07 Nov, 2008

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Dizzee Rascal tells Jeremy Paxman he wants to be prime minister

Watch the rapper's Newsnight interview online now

Thu 06 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

YES YES BLUD... YOU FEEL ME INNIT... I IZ GONNA BE DE PREZIDENT OF DE UNITED STATES OF BRITAIN... ONE LOVE RESPECTJesus christ, what a tool.

Thu 06 Nov, 2008

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Bloc Party announce five US shows

The gigs start next month in Los Angeles

Wed 05 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

What are the chances the dull fuckers will stay over there and stop polluting our airwaves with their tepid drivel?

Thu 06 Nov, 2008

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NME Cool List 2008 announced

Find out who made the cut and have your say on this year's run-down

Tue 04 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Mostly a cavalcade of cunts, as usual.

Tue 04 Nov, 2008

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Amy Winehouse reaches demo stage with new album

Singer has been working on the follow-up to 'Back To Black'

Tue 04 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Will it be called "Back to Crack?" Christ, she's shit and tedious.

Tue 04 Nov, 2008

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Wiley also caught in Lil' Wayne style 'BBC News' hoax

Internet death rumours strike across the Atlantic

Mon 03 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

Shit, and I'd already opened the champagne!

Mon 03 Nov, 2008

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Snoop Dogg and Massive Attack in new collaboration

The song is available to hear online now

Mon 03 Nov, 2008

Comments (3)

That's fucking AWFUL... more evidence that Massive are a washed out, money hungry joke. Compare it to I Against I - that was great. This is shite.

Mon 03 Nov, 2008

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Pussycat Doll hails Lewis Hamilton's Formula One championship win – Daily Gossip

Lily Allen, Take That, Oasis – your music gossip stop

Mon 03 Nov, 2008

Comments (1)

I think it's great that she's with him for his looks and personality and not his fabulous wealth and fame. No, really.

Mon 03 Nov, 2008

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Bloc Party consider dropping CD singles

Band say 'Talons' may be their last physical single release

Tue 28 Oct, 2008

Comments (2)

If we can just get these pointless twats to stop releasing anything at all, the world will be a measurably better place.

Tue 28 Oct, 2008

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Craig David becomes a Doctor

The R&B star receives honorary degree

Mon 27 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Is it a doctorate in proctology? Because he knows a lot about creating shit.

Mon 27 Oct, 2008

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Feeder in motorway crash drama

Bus explodes on M62

Sat 25 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

This is the most interesting thing Feeder have ever done. Yawn.

Mon 27 Oct, 2008

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Amy Winehouse rushed to hospital

Singer suffered a suspected chest infection yesterday (October 26)

Mon 27 Oct, 2008

Comments (2)

Let's hope she dies then we can stop having her pointless life rubbed all over the news all the time.

Mon 27 Oct, 2008

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50 Cent to resume acting career

Rapper will appear in '13'

Thu 23 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Mumbling and staggering about like you're severely constipated does not constitute acting.

Fri 24 Oct, 2008

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Listen to new Snow Patrol album 'A Hundred Million Suns' now

The band's new album is available to hear in full before its official release

Thu 23 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Poo patrol

Fri 24 Oct, 2008

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The Smiths definitely not reuniting for Coachella 2009

Sources close to band members say there's no chance of reunion

Fri 24 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Thank fuck!

Fri 24 Oct, 2008

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The Smiths to reform for Coachella 2009?

Reports say band are close to reunion deal

Fri 24 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Please God no...

Fri 24 Oct, 2008

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Morrissey to write autobiography

Former Smiths singer set to pen his memoirs

Wed 22 Oct, 2008

Comments (2)

Its working title is "How to make a career out of singing three notes and poncing about a bit".

Wed 22 Oct, 2008

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Scissor Sisters split with drummer

Band say Paddy Boom 'will always be our sister'

Tue 21 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Now we just need the rest of them to stop and the world will be a better place.

Tue 21 Oct, 2008

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Metallica announce another London O2 Arena date

Second capital show added before tickets are on sale

Tue 21 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

He's been genetically spliced with a goat

Tue 21 Oct, 2008

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AC/DC rope in Formula One fitness crew ahead of tour

The classic rockers need 'whipping into shape'

Tue 21 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

But they're not getting a "self awareness" coach to make them realise how ridiculous they look?

Tue 21 Oct, 2008

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Thu 01 Jan, 1970

Comments (1)

"Pot, meet kettle". These wank bands are BOTH utter shite.

Thu 16 Oct, 2008

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Coldplay reveal 'Prospekts March' EP artwork

The band have used another Eugene Delacroix painting for the cover

Wed 15 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Echo and the Bunnymen suck hefty balls

Thu 16 Oct, 2008

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Grace Jones brings 'Hurricane' tour to UK

Diva will play dates in January

Thu 16 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

She really is staggeringly overrated. Being deliberately scary and looking like a bloke does not make you worth listening to. It makes you a tedious fraud.

Thu 16 Oct, 2008

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Have you got a question for AC/DC's Angus Young?

Uncut wants your queries for the rock legend

Wed 15 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Isn't it obvious? It's because soundedd is a total and utter cunt bucket.

Thu 16 Oct, 2008

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ABBA man wins tax authority lawsuit

Bjorn Ulvaeus gets millions

Tue 14 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

How long did it take you to think up that comedy gem, you fucking dunce?

Wed 15 Oct, 2008

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Does It Offend You, Yeah? set for free NME Radio gig

Station celebrates FM broadcast with special show

Fri 17 Oct, 2008

Comments (3)

Is It A Lazy, Stupid, Irritating Name, Yeah?

Tue 14 Oct, 2008

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Pete Doherty denies using drugs on video

Babyshambles man has responded to claims

Tue 14 Oct, 2008

Comments (2)

Yeah, he's a spotty, talentless ratfaced prick

Tue 14 Oct, 2008

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Take That announce new album details

Band reveal album title and release date

Tue 14 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

OH GOD NO PLEASE NO

Tue 14 Oct, 2008

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Sigur Ros to release deluxe edition of latest album

It features massive photo book and original film strip

Mon 13 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Their sweeping post-rock soundscapes are the perfect accompaniment to the spectre of their country's economy going down the shitter.

Tue 14 Oct, 2008

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Jon Bon Jovi sued for £200 billion

Musician Samuel Bartley Steele claims the singer ripped off his lyrics

Mon 13 Oct, 2008

Comments (2)

Hahahaha that's fucking CLASSIC!! 200 billion... go on you mentalist!!

Mon 13 Oct, 2008

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Massive Attack's 3D records film soundtrack

Track appears in Italian flick 'Gomorrah'

Mon 13 Oct, 2008

Comments (2)

Don't you mean "3D gets other people to play all the music for a fairly paltry fee then takes the credit"? He's well known for it. Choosing bits of other people's ideas is a pretty poor basis for calling yourself a musician. Frankly I'm amazed they still have the respect they do - haven't put out a decent record since Blue Lines. A soulless parody of themselves these days.

Mon 13 Oct, 2008

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Babyshambles' Mick Whitnall arrested

The guitarist was taken into custody for suspected drug offences

Mon 13 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

He should also be charged with making utterly shit music

Mon 13 Oct, 2008

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Marilyn Manson band member found dead

Gidget Gein was 39

Sat 11 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

I wonder if now, given his untimely death, he would regret the fact that he spent most of his life using the pseudonym of a serial killer?

Sun 12 Oct, 2008

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Guns N' Roses to release 'Chinese Democracy' next month

Band reveal release date of long-awaited new album

Fri 10 Oct, 2008

Comments (2)

Anyone who heard the leaks will be very uninterested in this news... the music is fucking terrible.

Fri 10 Oct, 2008

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EMI to launch iTunes-rivalling download store?

Label is reportedly planning to take on iTunes and Amazon.com

Thu 09 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

How many times have we heard this claim? "ITunes killer, iPod killer, iphone killer" etc etc... they NEVER are. They're ALWAYS shite! When will people learn? Apple just does it better.

Thu 09 Oct, 2008

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MySpace Music suffers technical difficulties

What are described as 'critical portions' of the site go down

Thu 09 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

"MySpace is horribly unstable and basically a huge pile of shit" is not exactly news... we all know it.

Thu 09 Oct, 2008

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Oasis' Liam Gallagher: 'I'd make Noel's attacker eat his own dick'

Liam speaks out about Toronto attack on day one of UK tour

Wed 08 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

What a prize cunt

Thu 09 Oct, 2008

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Beatles' Paul McCartney slams McDonalds

Macca isn't happy that they're using the band's pictures to 'flog burgers'

Wed 08 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

That's pretty fucking rich from the man that signed up with Starbucks.

Wed 08 Oct, 2008

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Keane stream new album 'Perfect Symmetry' online

Band make new effort available to hear ahead of official release

Mon 06 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Wow, what a revolutionary tactic. Anyone daft enough to want to hear their awful "new direction" can get the album off bittorrent in about 5 minutes for free anyway.

Mon 06 Oct, 2008

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Razorlight: 'Making new album 'Slipway Fires' was easy'

Band claim new effort was a 'pleasure' to put together

Fri 03 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Yes it is easy making albums when they're as utterly shit as Razorshite's.

Fri 03 Oct, 2008

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Watch Sex Pistol John Lydon as the face of British butter

See the frontman's commercial efforts on NME.COM now

Fri 03 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

What an utter ballbag... he never had any talent, he's just a stupid, sneering wanker who worships money, as this dismal sellout campaign confirms.

Fri 03 Oct, 2008

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Gary Glitter evicted from Mayfair home

Neighbours object to sex offender's presence

Thu 02 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

"Fallen idol"?? Hardly. He was ALWAYS shit, never an idol.How the hell has he got so much money left? He should be forced to give it to the families of the children he abused.

Thu 02 Oct, 2008

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Dirty Pretty Things split up – exclusive

Carl Barat and co call it a day

Wed 01 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

finally some good news!

Wed 01 Oct, 2008

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Cypress Hill to headline London's 4 Freeze event

Rappers join the party at the Battersea Power Station

Wed 01 Oct, 2008

Comments (1)

Cypress hill and the Cuban Brothers are great but as for the rest of the lineup... what a shower of utter shit.

Wed 01 Oct, 2008

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The Hold Steady postpone UK tour

Guitarist Tad Kubler has been taken ill

Mon 29 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Cancelled? So there is some good news then!

Tue 30 Sep, 2008

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Guns N' Roses' 'Chinese Democracy' set for exclusive release this year?

Long-awaited album could be out before 2009

Sat 27 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

I've heard the leaked tracks, it's fucking wank. It's a bad joke. He needs to fuck off and morons need to stop indulging his twatty ego.

Mon 29 Sep, 2008

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Razorlight announce UK tour

Johnny Borrell and co hit the road this November

Fri 26 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

The only news I want to hear about Razorshite is that they are all dead

Fri 26 Sep, 2008

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MySpace Music launches

Service is live in the US and coming to the UK soon

Thu 25 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

WHat the fuck has that got to do with this story you fucking stroker?

Thu 25 Sep, 2008

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Sony Ericsson set to launch Apple iPhone rival next year

Service will enable users to download songs directly to their phone

Thu 25 Sep, 2008

Comments (2)

It'll be absolute shite just like every other failed iPhone ripoff!

Thu 25 Sep, 2008

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AC/DC slam Apple iTunes

Angus Young reveals why his band boycott the store

Thu 25 Sep, 2008

Comments (4)

Yes, it's just a coincidence that nobody would want to buy your utterly ridiculous, shit music anyway.

Thu 25 Sep, 2008

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New Apple iPhone rival to launch this week (beginning Sept 22)?

New Sony Ericsson service could be available soon

Mon 22 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

It'll be shite just like every other iPhone knockoff

Mon 22 Sep, 2008

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Foals and Holy Fuck to release split single

The bands will cover one of each other's songs

Wed 17 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Holy Lazy Shock Value By Putting A Swear Word In Your Band Name!

Thu 18 Sep, 2008

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Lily Allen announces new album release date

Singer also reveals she'll unveil extra material soon

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

The most interesting thing she ever did was flashing her rubbish tits

Wed 17 Sep, 2008

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Kanye West alters new track after negative fan reaction

Rapper bows to pressure after 'Love Lockdown' leaks

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

What a cock. I wish he'd listen to public opinion more often and stop making his shit music and whinging public statements,

Wed 17 Sep, 2008

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Metallica hit Number One on US chart

Veteran rockers score top spot on both sides of the pond

Wed 17 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Did you know they were originally called Metal Licker?

Wed 17 Sep, 2008

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Keane and Chaka Khan set for BBC Electric Proms

Acts join the likes of Last Shadow Puppets and The Streets

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

A true representation of how utterly shite British music is nowadays

Wed 17 Sep, 2008

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The Cure tell fans: 'Don't buy our music from iTunes'

Goth veterans also reveal new album tracklisting

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Don't worry we won't - and we won't buy it from shops either cos it's shite!

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

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Noel Gallagher to 'write sitcoms with Russell Brand'

Oasis leader to follow up his work on 'The Royle Family'?

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

This promises to be a cuntfest of epic proportions

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

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Jon 'The Reverend' McClure's 'quitting music' U-turn

The Rev has said he's changed his mind about giving up

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Oh God, him quitting was the one bit of good news I heard this year. What a hypocritical, publicity-seeking wanker. Do us all a favour and actually do quit you parrot-headed, talentless prick.

Tue 16 Sep, 2008

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U2's The Edge presents Peter Gabriel with human rights award

The former Genesis singer receives the award in London

Wed 10 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

lose the hat and admit your baldness like Gabriel!

Thu 11 Sep, 2008

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The Edge: delaying release will take U2 album 'to next level'

Plus guitarist praises Mercury Prize winners Elbow

Wed 10 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

You really don't get it do you kokboy?

Wed 10 Sep, 2008

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Arrest warrant issued for ex-BBC Radio 1 DJ

Andy Kershaw has allegedly broken his restraining order

Wed 10 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

He's a fucking lunatic! Too many years of listening to world music evidently turns people into alcoholic nutters.

Wed 10 Sep, 2008

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Apple launches new sleeker iPod

Nano gets smaller and cheaper

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Well I'm sure Apple are just shitting themselves about your disappointment

Wed 10 Sep, 2008

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Bloc Party reveal new non-album single - exclusive

'Talons' doesn't feature on recent download album 'Intimacy'

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

This band really gargles my balls.. they're bloody AWFUL.

Wed 10 Sep, 2008

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Amy Winehouse announces London club night

Singer will spin tunes in Camden on Thursday (Sept 11)

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

If we go, can we throw flaming bags of shit at her? That might go some small way towards redressing the balance for all the shit she brings into the world.

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

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Mercury Prize announced today (Sept 9)

Find out who wins on NME.COM tonight

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Ed, I have video evidence of you blowing goats.

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

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Naked Beth Ditto NME cover up for award

Classic shot included in 'best magazine cover' shortlist

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Thanks for that, I've just chucked up my breakfast at the sight of that fat whale

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

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Metallica admit 'we're bad at 'Guitar Hero''

However, band's new album is being released via game

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

They're pretty fucking awful on real guitars too

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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Amy Winehouse booed at Bestival

Grace Jones, Hot Chip and The Specials also play the rain-lashed bash

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Why can't the vapid, talentless crackhead just FUCK OFF and die quietly in a skip somewhere.

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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Nationwide Mercury Prize shortlist - your guide to the nominees

Who's who on the 2008 shortlist?

Tue 09 Sep, 2008

Comments (3)

Another predictably shit lineup for an award that now means less than nothing to anyone with taste

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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Mary J Blige announces North American tour

Singer will hit the road with Robin Thicke this autumn

Fri 05 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Is Robin Thicke then?

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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Towers Of London's Donny Tourette launches acting career

Reality TV star set to make his silver screen debut

Fri 05 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

What a pointless, talentless prick. Why can't he just fuck off back to the obscurity he so clearly deserves?

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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Russell Brand gets political at VMAs

British comedian shakes things up

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

How is this vapid dot-cotton soundalike and lookalike famous? He's not funny, he's ugly as fuck, he's intensely irritating. Ticks all the buttons for fame in 21st century britain then.

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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Razorlight announce new album details - exclusive

Johnny Borrell and the boys ready 'Slipway Fires'

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

OH GOD NO PLEASE MAKE THEM STOP

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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Oasis' Noel Gallagher assaulted in Toronto

Guitarist attacked during V Festival gig

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Good!

Mon 08 Sep, 2008

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DJ Grooverider released from Dubai prison

The DJ served 10 months in jail for drug possession

Fri 05 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

I bet his groove has been well and truly ridden now...

Fri 05 Sep, 2008

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Perez Hilton for live MTV Europe Music Awards webcast

Celebrity blogger will interview stars and report on gossip

Fri 05 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Why oh why give this sleazy turd more publicity? What an utter sack of shit he is.

Fri 05 Sep, 2008

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Kanye West to perform at MTV Awards

Singer swore last year he'd never return

Thu 04 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

What a fucking hypocrite

Fri 05 Sep, 2008

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Streets and Muse collaboration ditched

Mike Skinner says he doesn't think the song is any good

Thu 04 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

If only he applied the same rigorous standards to his own shit material

Thu 04 Sep, 2008

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Pigeon Detectives kick off mini US tour tonight

Plus there's an EP on the way

Wed 03 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

Shit band, shit knock off boring soundalike crap.

Wed 03 Sep, 2008

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Oasis' Noel Gallagher reveals his Top 10 bands

Find out the guitarist's definitive list

Wed 03 Sep, 2008

Comments (1)

What a surprise. You could also title this "bands Noel has ripped off wholesale and bare-faced for years"

Wed 03 Sep, 2008

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Amy Winehouse faces legal threat

French festival promoter fury at missed show

Sun 31 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

If everybody stops reporting it as headline news every time she farts, will she shut up and go away? How very fucking tedious she is.

Mon 01 Sep, 2008

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Alex Zane angry about Xfm suspension

Presenter says station are 'over-reacting'

Fri 29 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

This bloke is a proper tool. Fuck off and shut up Alex you scruffy twat

Fri 29 Aug, 2008

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James Blunt and Roots Manuva collaboration is on

Acts are serious about working together

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

OH PLEASE GOD NO

Fri 29 Aug, 2008

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Mike Skinner 'fucking sick' of The Streets

Skinner confirms he'll ditch his moniker after next album

Fri 29 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

He's fucking sick of the streets? He fucking knows how the rest of us have felt for years then. Mockney twat.

Fri 29 Aug, 2008

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Pussycat Doll pens song for Lewis Hamilton - Tabloid Hell

It's an 'emotional' track for F1 ace

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

I think it's great that they're famous because of their musical talent and not the fact that they all look like particularly expensive hookers.

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

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Andrew WK announces London show

It'll be his first live gig in over four years

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Does it stand for Andrew WanKer? Cos he looks like one.

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

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Blogger arrested for leaking Guns N' Roses tracks

FBI take Kevin Cogill into custody

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

I heard those tracks... they're bloody awful. Utter cheese. They would have sounded dated even if they had been released 15 years ago. What a load of old shite.

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

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Klaxons' record producer says new album will be 'melodic'

James Ford talks about Shadow Puppets too

Wed 27 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Couldn't they just settle for making one that's not as utterly shit as their previous output?

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

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Metallica stream new 'Death Magnetic' song online

'My Apocalypse' is available to listen to now

Wed 27 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Are they going to sue everyone who listens to it?

Thu 28 Aug, 2008

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Millions of McFly albums given away

The record came free with the Mail On Sunday newspaper

Wed 23 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Shit paper and shit band team up to bring you the worst shit imaginable!

Wed 27 Aug, 2008

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Enter Shikari announce UK tour

Plus St Albans and line-up new single

Fri 08 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Enter Shitkari

Wed 27 Aug, 2008

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Alex Zane suspended from Xfm Breakfast show

Radio DJ aired self-penned song about rape on his show

Wed 27 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Anything that gets this pointless, vapid, talentless student-looking asshat off our screens and airwaves must be applauded.

Wed 27 Aug, 2008

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Fall Out Boy learn of Obama's running mate when bowling with P Diddy

Pete Wentz reveals personal connection to Joe Biden

Tue 26 Aug, 2008

Comments (2)

How the hell does this qualify as news?

Wed 27 Aug, 2008

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Bloc Party release third album today (August 21)

'Intimacy' is available as a download now

Thu 21 Aug, 2008

Comments (2)

A fiver says it's as God-awful as the rest of their rubbish material

Thu 21 Aug, 2008

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'Wiltshire Police hate having Pete Doherty there'

Moonfest organiser claims police told him they despise the Babyshambles man

Wed 20 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

He's a talentless ballbag

Wed 20 Aug, 2008

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American teen quits school to play 'Guitar Hero'

16-year-old Blake Peebles wants a career out of it

Tue 19 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

What a wanker

Wed 20 Aug, 2008

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Babyshambles banned from headlining festival

Police say band could incite public disorder

Tue 19 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

They should be banned for being utterly shit and the embodiment of everything that is wrong with the British music scene.

Tue 19 Aug, 2008

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Reverend And The Makers' Jon McClure to quit music?

McClure says his next album will be his last

Tue 19 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Him and his band suck very, very hard and the sooner they shut up and piss off, the better

Tue 19 Aug, 2008

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Kings Of Leon slam bootleggers

Band say bootlegging stops them playing new material

Fri 15 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Anything that stops these talentless dullards releasing new material is absolutely fine in my book. I wonder how much we'd have to pirate to get them to stop altogether and split up?

Fri 15 Aug, 2008

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Bloc Party announce live webchat

Band will speak directly with fans this Monday (August 18)

Thu 14 Aug, 2008

Comments (2)

Can we ask them what's really on our minds, like why are they so shit and why don't they do the decent thing and stop attempting to make music?

Fri 15 Aug, 2008

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Babyshambles to release official book this November

Guide to Pete Doherty's band dishes the dirt on Kate Moss, says drummer

Thu 14 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Will it be called "How to be famous despite being an utterly talentless junkie in a totally shit band"?

Thu 14 Aug, 2008

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New Verve album streams online

Listen to all ten songs on 'Forth' now

Thu 14 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Verve-by-numbers. Big tax bill to pay lads?

Thu 14 Aug, 2008

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U2 name new album?

Band register website for 'No Line On The Horizon'

Thu 14 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Bollocks, you're a moron. They may be well past their prime but they've written some brilliant music. The infinite number of shit guitar bands clogging up the pages of the music press with their abysmal skinny-jeans-and-shouting three chord guitar wank are the tossers who deserve abuse.

Thu 14 Aug, 2008

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Mark Ronson to produce second Rumble Strips album

Plus the band have signed to Ronson's label

Tue 12 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

can somebody keep Mark Ronson away from music please?

Tue 12 Aug, 2008

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XX Teens speak about political protest during Underage performance

Band invited activist Brian Haw onstage with them

Tue 12 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Finally, a band articulately saying something important. I am a pretty harsh critic of the NME but kudos to them for reporting this. Their music is pretty good too.

Tue 12 Aug, 2008

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Antony And The Johnsons to play orchestra shows on both coasts

There's also details of a new EP

Mon 11 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

He is a berk now

Tue 12 Aug, 2008

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Prince bans dentist from covering 'Purple Rain'

The Purple One gets toothache from NHS dentist

Tue 12 Aug, 2008

Comments (3)

He really is the most miserable bastard...

Tue 12 Aug, 2008

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Morrissey explains album delay

Plus former Smiths mainman reacts to new 'Best Of' plans

Mon 11 Aug, 2008

Comments (2)

No more live dates? Every cloud has a silver lining then... We will be spared his poncy, three-note-singing rubbish for a few months. Truly the world's most overrated, flouncing idiot.

Mon 11 Aug, 2008

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John Lydon slams 'Aimless Winehouse' for 'imitating black music'

Sex Pistol hits out at the singer's 'idiotic' jazz style

Fri 01 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Amy Wino is crap but talentless, sneering waste of space Lydon can't criticise anyone for anything. Pot, meet kettle.

Fri 01 Aug, 2008

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Petition asking Bono to retire launches

Nearly $400 has been pledged so far

Fri 01 Aug, 2008

Comments (1)

Hahahahahha!

Fri 01 Aug, 2008

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Billy Corgan sues filmmaker

Smashing Pumpkins frontman seeks $100,000 in damages

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

He looks exactly like a pumpkin

Fri 01 Aug, 2008

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Massive Attack and Santogold set for Becks Fusions festival

Bands will team up with visual artists at the bash in Manchester

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

Comments (2)

Does anyone know what Daddy G actually does to justify getting paid? The odd bit of dreary rapping and picking up huge pay cheques...

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

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Burial now favourite for Mercury Prize

The 'Banksy of dubstep' overtakes Radiohead in betting

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

If he wins, at least it will kill the lazy musical abortion that is dubstep

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

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Oasis new single previewed online

Clip of 'The Shock Of The Lightning' is available to hear now

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Have they not got enough money yet? Do we really have to be subjected to more awful rubbish which, in 12 months, Noel will admit was crap anyway?

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

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Fergie says she's 'thrilled' to play a prostitute

She also discusses new Black Eyed Peas album

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

It won't be acting, she's filthy. Just look at her.

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

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Couple get engaged at Bloc Party's LA show

Does It Offend You, Yeah? create mosh pit with opening set

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

Comments (2)

If you're at a Bloc Party gig your life is already devoid of meaning. Getting married isn't going to help. Bloc Party are the worst band in the history of the universe.

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

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Sam Sparro reschedules US shows

And there’s a few more added in September

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Sparro? Who is this faceless berk? Yet another crap singer. God help us.

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

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The Streets offer new track as free download today (July 30)

'The Escapist' is available to get for nothing now

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

I thought he said he was quitting music... hurry up then you talentless mockney turd.

Thu 31 Jul, 2008

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Guy Ritchie bases new film character on Pete Doherty

Director says: 'It's either genius marketing or a happy - or unhappy - accident'

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Just when you thought Guy Richie's career couldn't sink any further down the bog, he bases a career on professional waste of space Doherty.

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

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Amy Winehouse 'not using drugs', says singer's mother

Janis Winehouse reveals she does have the 'odd sneaky cigarette'

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Does this woman also believe the moon is made of green cheese? Berk.

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

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New Babyshambles song surfaces

'Arcady' is online now

Tue 29 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Shit band release shit music shocka

Wed 30 Jul, 2008

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Duffy: 'Illegal downloading is a good thing'

Singer says online sharing puts 'music in people's lives'

Tue 29 Jul, 2008

Comments (2)

Her "music" is so god-awful I expect she's glad that anybody listens to it, even if they pirate it.

Tue 29 Jul, 2008

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Ash to continue album boycott with new release

Trio stick to 'no more LPs' pledge

Mon 28 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

It's good job nobody gives a crap about Ash any more so nobody will notice.

Mon 28 Jul, 2008

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Download Kings Of Leon's new song for free here

Get new track 'Crawl' as a free download now

Mon 28 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Kings of Yawn more like... dull, tedious rubbish.

Mon 28 Jul, 2008

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Andrew WK takes up lecturing

New Yorker heading to the UK as a 'motivational public speaker'

Mon 28 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Does it stand for Andrew WanKer?

Mon 28 Jul, 2008

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Brian Wilson refunding unsatisfied fans after gig

Former Beach Boy wants to keep fans 'cool'

Fri 18 Jul, 2008

Comments (1)

Everyone has bad days, and this is a really really classy gesture on Brian's part. I've Been lucky enough to see him live 3 times, and he's been amazing every time.

Sun 20 Jul, 2008

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Agyness Deyn to play Club NME this week (July 18)

Model will join Five O'Clock heroes onstage

Wed 16 Jul, 2008

Comments (2)

are you missing something from this story? like, I don't know.. THE NAME OF THE BAND IT'S ABOUT???

Wed 16 Jul, 2008

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Reuben go on indefinite hiatus

Camberley band call it a day

Fri 06 Jun, 2008

Comments (1)

who?

Fri 06 Jun, 2008

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Kaiser Chiefs Ricky Wilson: 'Oasis have disappeared up their own arse'

Singer says his band are ready to replace legends

Sat 31 May, 2008

Comments (1)

wow.. not content with trying to sound like blur musically, he even goes as far as trying to emulate the blur/oasis rivalry.. Another stunningly original effort from the kaiser chiefs. Well done.

Sun 01 Jun, 2008