God bless the humble handclap. Pop would be bereft without it. But what do you get when you soul-shuffle it with the Wigan Casino, a Phil Spector wig and five…

‘Twist And Shout’, ‘I Was Dancing In The Lesbian Bar’, ‘Into The Groove’, ‘Let’s Dance’, ‘Dancing Queen’. Pop music’s apex is surely reached once you start singing about dancing. Bollocks…