Hey, this’ll ruin your day: ”I’ve got the moves like Jagger.” Just consider those words for a moment. “I’ve got the moves like Jagger, moves like Jagger, ooo-wee-ooo…” The song is now lodged in your brain. It’ll be there for hours. There is no escape. You could trepan yourself with a Bowie knife and it’d still be there, ooo-wee-ooing round your cerebellum. It’s the ultimate earworm.

Maroon 5: Make it stop!
My chagrin-o-meter dinged way into the red this morning upon discovering Westlife's Kings Of Leon cover on YouTube. Hard to know which bit of this is most dispiriting.The synchronised pogo-ing during the chorus? The bow-legged crotch-thrusting at 0.56? The way they sing the whole thing like they're auditioning for The Voice? The fact you just know they're going to do that one-hand steering wheel move when it gets to the "head while I'm driving" line.
Warning: after listening to this you may never want to listen to Kings Of Leon, or have sex, ever again.
Your peripheral vision is a strange beast - keep your eyes on the cross and hit play.
Possessives and contractions, yo. By Mac Lethal.
In the new issue of NME we name floppy-haired Alex Kapranos-produced five-piece Citizens! are one of the hottest new bands in the UK right now. Don't believe us? You can judge for yourself by streaming their debut album right here...

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