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In The NME Office - Behind the scenes at NME -  Behind the scenes at NME

By Jamie Fullerton

Posted on 23/11/07 at 11:50:35 am

It’s Friday again, and to while away time until the weekend officially starts, we’ve been coming up with bands as England’s performance against Croatia. Here’s what we’ve come up with so far:

Baby-shambles
Chronic Youth
Capdown and out
Lame-y Winehouse

continued...

Boy Kill school-Boy stuff
Couldn't Hit A Cow's Arse With A Ban-Joe Lean And The Jing Jang Jong
Poo Fighters
Black Heartless Procession
Spineless Tap
Radiohead-less chickens
The Horrors
Hopeless Of The States
Kraftberks
Adam and the Pants
Seasick Steve McLaren
David Bo-We Was Robbed (except we kind of weren’t)

Can you beat those? Add a few in the comments box below.

75 comments

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sonny d [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:08
Arcade you're fired
sonny d [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:13
hoe about this obvious one- Dodgy
DOD [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:15
Poo Fighters? Poo Shite-rs!
gggy [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:15
An*l C*nt
liam spencer [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:18
Hang Steve Mclaren from The Gallows!
Cheesegut [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:24
Hardfailedtoquali-Fi
flumphert [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:25
The Good, The Bad & The Just Plain Shite
James F [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:33
'All That Remains' is a home nations cup. Billy Talentless Brand New manager. cap(s)down the drain for the players. Faith No More (in our country) Hell Is For Heroes and McLaren. Hopesfall (en) English Football, It Dies Today (well wednesday!) The Killers of pride. Madness. The Starting Line was wrong.
sonny d [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:36
Dire straits
Gilly [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:38
Garbage - Simple!
[Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:39
The Mighty BOOOS!!
Mouse [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:41
RubBISh, Pussycat Dulls, Nation Of Uselessness, Urge Overrated, Very Ordinary Boys,
Jam [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:45
Kax-ons.
Craig E [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:56
razorshite
Oddbodjnr [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:57
Shite and McLarnics or The Whiteshites (and Redshites) or Heck-hes maynotgointoEUer's (should sound a little like Dexy's Midnight Runners !)
ShotByBothSides [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 12:57
The early Doors, Sick Of It All, Taking Back Sunday League, Sheryl Crow-atia, My Mumm-Ra could've done better than that
Richie D [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:00
Johnny blunders & the heartbreakers Joy(less league) Division (2 football) Clap Your Hands Say what a load of shit!
Pablo L [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:06
our two scorers - Fatboy (and) Slim (Don't)Clap your hands (or) say yeah
old, but... [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:12
the doo badleys.
Jamie C [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:13
sick as the parrots,
Paul [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:20
gASH
JAMES MEYER [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:20
Crappy mondays
Terry Venables ( aka Cedric Ballbag) [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:20
Sineoverpaid O'Conner Franz if only we had Les Ferdinand iforwardrussia into the euros! Gang of Four four two McClaren you ballbag! Goldcrapp (as in the golden generation are crap) (will) Stevie - McClaren cry into his tea i - Wonder? Take That The Sex Pistols at Dawn Robbed-us and Jerome (even though they clearly didn't) !!! Duran Darren Anderton!
Douglas Gibbons [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:20
(G)ash
Douglas Gibbons [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:21
Shite Eyes
Paul [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:22
Wild-no-hearts
gedz [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:22
and you will know us by the trail of mediocrity
sebastian Tempest [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:22
Lampard couldn't hit a barn the doors..... Tenuous but true
Sebastian tempest [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:25
The Ramoans is all we get to do now. Over paid pre MADONNA s
gedz [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:25
the charlatans
Douglas Gibbons [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:26
Travisty
Ivan [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:28
Suicidal Tendencies The Stupids
Daculaar [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:29
Badly Performed Boys, Can't Find Glory, Low Performance Allstars, The Good The Bad and England.
myuncleoswald [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:31
givur toss
myuncleoswald [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:33
nickelback in your box mclaren
Douglas Gibbons [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:33
The No! Team
Richie D [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:38
Jarvis Cock-ups, Biffy Crapo
Dan [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:48
What about albums...Nevermind; WAKE UP BOOOOOOO!
Laura [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:48
Couldn't Bloc Party R.eally E.mbarrasing M.atch
Gem [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:52
Bile-ser Chiefs, No-shots In Disguise, Gold-crapp, Queens of the No Play
Iredale [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:54
The red and White Stripes were shite Sum 2-3 we missed Rooney Red Hot shitty Peppers OUT-kast Ok Go 2-0 Maximo shite Good Shoes shit feet Forward, Russia! england out
stevo [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:54
scouting for a new manger
stevo [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 13:54
scouting for a new manger
Pablo L [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 14:00
Fats and small (lampard n SWP), Steve McClaren should jump off a Cliff Richards, Maximo played-off-the-Park
deadairspace [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 14:01
selfish c**nts - the most appropriate surely?
Mark [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 14:55
Rage Against The Mananger Green Day presents English Idiot(s) Lostcauses Pearl(We're in a)Jam Manic Street Preachers-Generation Shite You Say Beaten We Say It Was The Pitch Muse-Absolution (Not On Your Nelly) Sex Pistols-Never Mind The Bollocks Heres Croatia
Kev B [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:16
Boyz II Men 3, The Chokes, Lay-Z, Stinkin Park, Talcum Mclaren?
Kate [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:16
Crap-play
[Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:20
Mercury Rev-olting performance, Snoop Doggy Dogg shit
Ivan [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:27
Minor Threat !
liv [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:29
Fart Brut Inter-poo
James [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:48
WANK
GargoyleWaiting [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:53
what "A" pile of useless overrated overpaid incompetent half cocked couldn't-score-in-a-brothel-on-their-birthday self satisfied lazy bastards
JAMES MEYER [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 15:57
the shite stripes fall were f*cking out boy
[Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 16:29
to all the players- Frankly go to hollywood thirty pretty things and a few long blondes but no foo fighters they played like they couldn't give an arctic monkeys bye bye bad man.
DiarmuidO'Sheeran [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 16:35
D'Oh..asis
Steve [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 16:40
Blow-asis, The Stone Pansies, Dirty Ugly Things, The Rolled-Over Stones, The Beat-les, Kaiser Shites, Death Cab for England, Not a-MUSE-d, Can't get the Ball INTERPOLs, Croatia Eat England,
Marco [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 16:47
Madness!
Marco [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 16:58
Panic! at the FA!, The Pixies, The Steve Maccabees, Nightmares on Macs!
Bilbo [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 17:02
Never mind the bollocks!
Chris [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 17:50
! forward croatia ! cudnt get the exclamation mark upside down sorry
luke [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 17:57
madness
lukelibertine [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 18:01
shit disco?
Bran [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 18:03
England make shOASIS of themselves
manuel [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 18:12
the beaten-les!!! shoddy woddy razorshite footballing for girls
Danatello [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 18:16
U2-3
Danatello [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 18:32
The Worse Than Ordinary........Boys
MickFleetwood [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 20:22
UB40
emmmmma [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 21:52
Holy Fuck! and a song...what will steve do now?
David [Visitor] //November 23 2007 at 23:58
Interplop
Will [Visitor] //November 24 2007 at 21:16
Pretty Shitty Things
Bob [Visitor] //November 25 2007 at 11:26
The enemy...
James [Visitor] //November 25 2007 at 21:02
Kate (england were) Gash
orangutan [Visitor] //November 26 2007 at 04:38
YEAH YEAH YEAHHHHHHS! (hell, I'm not an England Fan, wish Luxembourg will qualify)
monkey [Visitor] //November 29 2007 at 15:34
all time low, nightmare of england, shit of the year, croatia's motto: strike anywhere, relient croatia, none more crap, miles from europe,

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