Noel Gallagher has just given a press conference at Wembley Stadium this afternoon (October 16) announcing the band’s 2009 tour dates.

NME.COM was there. Here is Noel's press conference in full:

You were the last British band to play Wembley – not counting Toploader who supported Bon Jovi and are rubbish - how does it feel to be back?
"It's quite a big gaff. This is the first time I've come through the door. I've not been to a concert there yet. It’s a great British venue. I guess it's going to be great."

Will you beat Manchester City here?
"I don’t think City are going to be here this season, not yet, but when we were walking out I was thinking we could afford 565 million of these, know what I mean. I can't see City getting here this year so we'll be representing them at all stadiums again next year."

Why did you decide to play Heaton Park in Manchester?
"The last person to play there was The Pope in 1982. It seems a shame to let it sit there doing nowt. We had a few gigs booked in Man City's stadium, but the new owners told us they didn't need to do gigs as they don't need the money. Neither do we, but it would be a laugh. That was the next suitable venue - the obvious next one would have been Old Trafford, but no way. I supported The Pope the last time, doing stand-up. I did the first 45 minutes so you wouldn't have seen me. Didn't go down too well."

Kasabian and The Enemy as support, why?
"Kasabian, we toured with them in the States a couple of years ago, and we've since become quite close to them. We always said that when we'd do the supergroup, super-concert again we’d give them first option. The Enemy I've liked since their first single. Looking at the bill, I think these are going to be the gigs of next year, if not the decade for a certain demographic.

"I'm just glad I can get tickets. These are the gigs that people remember, they meet future wives. I give thanks that we're headlining it and not some heritage act on before a bunch of kids. If I was a 16 year-old again, I'd think this was the gig of the century, of the decade."

continued...

How do you and Liam approach these shows?
“The first kind of stadium we did was in Manchester (Maine Road in April 1996). It never felt daunting to play to 40,000 people then. Some bands sit in their dressing room, quaking in their boots. They're all there to see me play guitar. What’s the worst that can happen? You’re shit - so what? Life is there to be lived. If you don’t aim for that, you may as well play The Astoria. This is it, it's here and it's now. I give thanks that we're going to be headlining here. Liam on the other hand, was shitting it (before Maine Road)."

What do you think of current pop talent?
"People think I'm always putting X Factor down and I'm not denying the right to kids to better their own lives, but it's not really about the music, is it? They're shite, to be honest. Kids from Barnsley singing in American accents? It's like 'Who's got the biggest sob story? 'My cat died, and his outstretched paw was pointing towards the X on the screen, so I've come here today Simon to sing 'What's New Pussycat'. I like the way he always says 'you're exactly what this competition is all about', they're not, it's all about him!

"My eight-year old daughter loves it. Especially when a girl group came on and said they were going to sing 'Wonderwall' by Ryan Adams. I had to reassure her that I did indeed write that song. 'Ryan is a friend of Dad's'.”

What do you think about free downloads?
"I wouldn't give an album away for free. I wouldn't give my own songs away for free. I think £19.99 for an album is pretty much… I'd go with that. I don't give a shit about the music industry. We're trying to self-contain. The music industry got too big, record labels are now like sprawling industries that can't contain themselves.

"The industry will eventually land in a place where it's more about the product and less about the razzmatazz. If anything's come from this current climate it's that records are shooting out. I think the current prices are OK, what is it, £7.99 online? That enough to keep my swimming pool full of mineral water."

Will you play the Wembley gig in the round?
“No, that's a bit Rod Stewart. I think we'll be doing it in the traditional sense. There's a stage at one end, a bar at the other, and a bit in the middle which you don't get involved in if you're over 25. I'd rather face the audience, rather than flashing lights. As long as there's big movie footage of me playing guitar.

"The second night (at Wembley Stadium in 2000) was quite monumental, because Liam had been out with a Spice Girl the night before – a Spice Girl - and he didn’t bother going to bed. It was the first comedy performance at the old Wembley. The first night was great, the second night was excruciating. I'm not annoyed with him, it's his band as much as mine. But it's all over YouTube though!"

Are you tempted to headline Glastonbury next year?
"I think that when Michael Eavis reads this press release he’ll shit himself. I wouldn't bother to play Glasto. Here is where it's going to be at next summer. Would you go? Why, is R Kelly playing? I've said before we wouldn't play there again, we always blow the big gigs, we always manage to George Best it.

"The first time we played Glasto, we played too many songs off 'Morning Glory', and it hadn't come out yet. Glasto is great to be at, but it's not great for people like us to play at. You're on at 11, and the people you're with are absolutely battered. Your girlfriend stops making sense. So, no, we won't play next year."

Do you have any rituals before you go on?
"Of course, slaughtering goats and all that. The first time we seen it was Travis. They have a hug and a little jig. No, we don't. We're Northern men, you know what I mean? We enjoy ourselves in silence, and suffer in silence. There's always the new drummer. 'Enjoy yourself, this is probably your last gig'. We've a strange relationship in the band, it'd freak most people out."

Can you tell us about your plans for the Electric Prom gig?
“We’re doing it with the Crouch End Choir. There's 150 of them, but we can only fit 60 on stage. We’ve already had a rehearsal with them, with a kitchen in Muswell Hill. It was a pretty big kitchen. Oasis' big songs are kind of like hymns anyway, so it's kind of celestial in places, and ridiculous in others.

"They're made up that they can wear their own clothes! They'd look silly wearing all black and doing that dance. I guess it's great that we're playing in Camden. I don’t think we've ever played in Camden before. Ten minutes home, shower, then out again afterwards."

Would you give Michael Eavis tickets to these gigs?
"I only joke when I say things about Michael. I spoke to him and Emily six weeks ago. Anyway I think he'll be a bit busy next summer."