To the ever-increasing list of people Kanye West has compared himself to, you may now add Walt Disney – and that gem is just one of an embarrassment of weekend tweets from the rapper. “I am consumed by my purpose to help the world,” he wrote as he declared himself $53,000,000 in debt, asking Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg to invest $1,000,000,000 into his own ideas. “I know it’s your bday but can you please call me by 2mrw,” he pleaded. “I am your favorite artist but you watch me barely breathe and still play my album in your house.”
He went on to ask for Zuckerberg’s help to “make the world a better place”, ask Google co-founder Larry Page for his help too, and then actually just ask all the San Francisco Silicon Valley types who listen to hip hop to give him a few dollars. “You’d rather open up one school in Africa like you really helped the country,” he said, seeming to berate them for education-providing tokenism instead of funding his genius. “If you want to help… help me,” he said. “I promise I’m going to make the world dope. All I do is make shit dope.”
As if to prove his point, Kanye then shared a private image from four years ago of all the ‘dope’ things he’s planning to expand into with the help of Mark Zuckerburg’s cool billion. This would be done through his creative content company Donda, named after his late mother. Below is his mega-chart – some of the suggestions are actually admirable, some overly ambitious, and some properly far out. Let’s take a look at five of the weirdest.
1. 7-screen movie experience
Kanye’s actually already created this in real life, to screen his Cruel Summer film, and the idea was officially patented on July 12, 2013. No word on it since, though.
2. Wallpaper screens
This idea sounds quite like Futurama’s Holoshed (a parody of the Star Trek Holodeck) except that idea is about a whole room. What it more closely resembles is the scene from The Hunger Games where protagonist Katniss picks up a remote control in her swanky Tribute room and changes her window into a screen to display a forest. Not very environmentally friendly.
3. Emoticon auto-correct
Kanye says this list was written in 2012. #2012
4. Luxury search engine
To look for stuff to spend $53m you don’t have on, obviously.
5. Hovercrafts for home
We all love hovercrafts.
Hovercrafts are awesome.
Wouldn’t we all like to know, Rick.