There’s nothing worse than a musician going “on hiatus”.
Yes, today we’re saying a very loud “HIYA!” to Dr Dre who just announced he was “taking a little bit of a break from music.”
Oh Dre don’t tell us, it’s you not us isn’t it? Did we steal all the duvet cover? Hog the bathroom in the morning? Or were we too needy? Craning our necks around the “upcoming releases” list waiting for ‘Detox’ like some foolish chumps?
It’s been nine lonely years since the legendary rapper/producer announced that ‘Detox’ would be happening. Instead we’ve had to make do with some guest spots and staring longingly at some very expensive headphones.
So, in honour of the doctor, here's five more acts “on hiatus” that need to pull their fingers out and start releasing new stuff.
1) Lily Allen
Lily, we know you’ve retired to have babies, live in the country and start effing and blinding at the local W.I., but why do you have to be such a prolific Tweeter? It’s like you’re teasing us with your witty bon-mots, like a not-so-silent reminder of your brilliant, on-the-money lyrics. You were a Grade A popstar and frankly, the landscape is pretty beige without you. Come back, Lily, you know you want to.
2) David Bowie
The latter half of the noughties were a lonely decade without the appearance of The Dame. Going from a constant pop-culture monolith to, well, nothing - it feels like a little death to us. Your unmistakably Day-Vyyyd backing vocals for TV On The Radio and Scarlett Johansson have had us chomping at the bit for new stuff.
You know the saying, two heads are better than one. Despite the fact that Big Boi’s solo debut and Glastonbury appearance was one of the best performances of the summer and Andre 3000’s recent verses on Beyonce and Drake’s albums were scene-stealing, it’s been a whole FIVE YEARS since the not-really-an-album-but-a-soundtrack-album-album ‘Idlewild’. Can we get the old duo back together now, please?
4) Lauryn Hill
The last time Lauryn Hill released an album we were using shillings. Well not quite, but you get the idea. And we wouldn’t be so bothered if ‘The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill’ wasn’t so once-in-a-lifetime brilliant, influencing everyone from Amy Winehouse to Nicki Minaj. Time to get back in the studio, Ms. Hill.
5) The Sundays
The Sundays’ light shone very briefly, a slice of pastoral loveliness that was equal part The Smiths, The Cocteau Twins and Halls Of Residence angst. Harriett Wheeler’s voice rose heaven-bound as did David Gavurin’s twisting guitar chords. We haven’t heard a peep since 1997 and, gosh darn it, we’ve missed you like buggery.
Who do YOU think needs to come back out of hiatus? Tell us below.