Nothing bears out Sid Vicious' famously blunt assessment of the Great British public – "I've met the man on the street, and he's a c*nt" – like a PRS survey of the nation's listening tastes.
According to data released today by the Performing Rights Society, the song most often chosen to soundtrack the first dance at UK weddings is Lonestar's 'Amazed'.
If you've not heard it, it's one of those soapy, country-tinged blockbuster ballads that are predominantly listened to by hiccupping, ten gallon hat-wearing rednecks in SUVs on their way to NASCAR rallies. Imagine 'Freedom Isn't Free' from 'Team America' crossed with Aerosmith's 'I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing' (which coincidentally is at number two in the list – what is it with newly-weds and asphyxiating schmaltz?)
The whole thing is reminiscent of those awful run-downs of the most popular funeral songs that occasionally surface. The last time those figures were totted up, in 2006, James Blunt's 'Goodbye My Lover' came out on top.
Fair enough – hateful as Blunt is, the lyrics are appropriate to the occasion. You can't say the same about the number three song in the list: Jennifer Warnes and Bill Medley's 'I've Had The Time Of My Life'. What are you supposed to do during the jerky sax wig-out at the end? Pull shapes?
And isn't the title a touch too literal for such a sombre occasion? In terms of demonstrating tact and sensitivity, you might as well blast our Dirty Pretty Things' 'Bang Bang You're Dead'.
However, it's wedding songs that interest me most, partly because I'm getting married myself next June and I need some ideas. There must be some tracks that are suitable for a first dance without being unbearably cheesy..?
And no, 'Big Balls' by AC/DC is not appropriate.