Obviously only a flint-hearted bastard would say anything negative about a song that aims to raise money for the unimpeachable War Child charity, and we intend to donate some money right now to atone for what we’re about to say.

But there’s something profoundly wrong about Young Soul Rebels’ cover of The Killers’ ‘All These Things That I’ve Done’, an over-egged wail-fest that marries the cloying sentimentality of P. Diddy’s Biggie Smalls tribute ‘I’ll Be Missing You’ with a too-slick production that makes you think of empty midweek shopping precincts and billowing KFC wrappers.

Young Soul Rebels, by the way, are a “supergroup” made up of Pixie Lott, N-Dubz, Tinchy Stryder, Frankmusic and others. But why is the song called ‘I Got Soul’ and not ‘All These Things That I’ve Done’?

‘I Got Soul’ is out October 19, and obviously it’s for a good cause. But even so…