249 votes, one giant step for mankind
The fallout from yesterday’s (June 8) general election won’t stop for some time. The country is in a state of flux. But there are a couple of certainties: Theresa May has had a nightmare, Jeremy Corbyn’s won the youth vote and Lord Buckethead has absolutely smashed it.
First of all, meet Lord Buckethead.
He stands for “Strong, not entirely stable, leadership,” and he’s run for office three times in an attempt to win protest votes. He has a thing for running against Tory leaders. In 1987, he went up against Margaret Thatcher, campaigning to demolish Birmingham in order to build a spaceport. Five years later, he ran against then Prime Minister John Major. And after a 15 year break from the political spotlight, yesterday he ran for election in Maidenhead. Democracy is amazing.
Theresa May wasn’t having the greatest of nights in the first place. Then she had to stand on a platform alongside arch nemesis Buckethead, a Monster Raving Loony Party candidate and a life-sized Elmo. Life comes at you fast.
When Buckethead showed up in Maidenhead, he was a man on a mission. He had There was only one thing on his mind.
Let’s take a closer look at some of the highlights from his manifesto. Honestly, if you thought Labour were making some big promises, wait for this:
– Ceefax to be brought back immediately, with The Oracle and other Teletext services to be rolled out by the next Parliament.
– Nationalisation of Adele: in order to maximise the efficient use of UK resources, the time is right for great British assets to be brought into public ownership for the common good. This is to be achieved through capital spending.
– Legalisation of the hunting of fox-hunters.
– Katie Hopkins to be banished to the Phantom Zone.
With promises like that, Lord Buckethead could never lose. And as the results came in, he was rewarded with his highest number of votes ever – 249. If that’s not a mandate for strong, not entirely stable, governance, nothing is.