It's been three years since the last series of Peep Show - which means three years of hammering the boxsets, treating ourselves to white bread for pudding and eating dogs on boats while we wistfully waited for the El Dude Brothers to return with new, epically awkward humour.
Last night, fans of the Brit-com breathed a sigh of relief as the first episode of the last series finally aired on Channel 4. Peep Show was back, and – after some questionable moments in previous seasons – it wasn’t just funny, it was hilarious.
Titled 'The William Morris Years', the series nine opener began on the mean streets of Dalston, east London, as Mark Corrigan and Jeremy Usborne reunited after six months apart, following an attempt by Jez to profess his love for Mark’s girlfriend, Dobby – a move that pretty much breaks every rule in the friend book.
Here are the greatest moments from episode one. And it goes without saying: MASSIVE SPOILER ALERT!
All Of The Juicing
“Hard hats on – time to descend into the depths of depravity,” states Mark as he and Jeremy arrive at drug fiend Super Hans’ stag do. However, rather than a Bacchanalian orgy that would make Pete Doherty weep, they are greeted with a health nut’s green liquid-centric paradise. “Let’s detox until we’ve got mega cocks,” poetically exclaims ‘Sober Hans’. This kind of wholesome madness doesn’t last for long however…
“Mm, that is quite refreshing,” reasons Hans after a tiny sip of beer “just to whet the whistle”. Next thing you know the stag party is assembled in the skanky lavs of some seedy pub, as Hans sings a song which features the memorable line “I love cocaine!”. As qualified life coach Jez offers advice to a waitress Hans slurs “I wanna go full horrible – where are the nasties?” There’s our boy.
Jeremy’s New Accommodation
After moving out of Mark’s place, Jez is now bunking in with Hans and his fiancée, in less than salubrious surroundings - he's living in their bathroom. However, he’s got a bleakly positive spin on sleeping in the tub. “It’s not Number 1 Hyde Park Palace, but it suits me down to the ground,” he reasons. “I like to think of it as a sunken bed.”
Mark’s New Flatmate
Since we’ve been away, Mark has replaced Jez with a new flatmate, colleague Jerry – played by cult comedian Tim Key with fitting smarminess. Jerry is worryingly obsessed with the 19th century Arts and Crafts movement but Mark does not share his enthusiasm. “Urgh, more William Morris. Wallpaper and workers rights,” says his internal monologue when Jerry suggests putting on a DVD about the bearded Victorian chap. “It’s like the dark ages, centuries and centuries of nothing to look forward to except the slim possibility a Viking might break down the door and rape me.”
Getting Rid Of Jerry
There's only one thing for it. Jerry has to go and Jez needs to take his place. “What about going Litvinenko,” suggests Jez as a way to remove Jerry from the flat. “Kill him, with polonium?” asks Mark. “Not full Litvinenko – just a little bit of something debilitating in his pasta each night. Grind him down, weaken him until he’s all pathetic and you can just scoop him up like a sick whippet and dump him.” Instead of sinister spy poisoning, they simply move him out while he sleeps. “We’re the Croydon Bullingdon!” smiles Mark when they’re disturbed by a neighbour, mid-way through dragging an enraged Jerry to the lift in his sleeping bag.
Roll on episode two, and catch episode one on All4 now.
SEE ALSO: Peep Show: The Genius Of Mark, Jez And Co In 21 Brilliant Quotes