News that Dylan’s ‘Blowin’ In The Wind’ is to be used to promote The Co-op supermarket inevitably inspired us to revisit His Bobness’ past crimes in this field.
Exhibit A: the mildly creepy ad for Victoria’s Secret lingerie in which Dylan skulks around scowling while a svelte underwear model writhes for the camera.
Evidently reveling in the chance to rile environmentalists and lefties who would presume to box him in as an iconoclast (he’s been pulling that trick ever since ‘Don’t Look Back’), Dylan’s next move was to advertise a gas-guzzling Cadillac SUV:
Here are ten more distressing examples of musicians cashing in…
1. John Lydon – Country Life butter
It’s pointless accusing Lydon of ‘selling out’. He’d gleefully agree. This is the man who christened the Pistols’ 1996 comeback the ‘Filthy Lucre’ tour.
2. Slash – Volkswagen
Because nothing screams rock’n’roll like a moderately-priced saloon car, right?
Turns out Slash is no stranger to plugging products. He also filmed this ad for Mastercard, which never aired, presumably because it encouraged guitar shop vandalism amongst kids.
Back in the 80s, Slash also plugged short-lived metal mag ‘Rip’ although, judging by the axeman’s frazzled demeanour, he possibly wasn’t entirely compos mentis at the time.
3. Alice Cooper – school stationery
Can’t help but feel the two-fingers-to-the-Man rancour of ‘School’s Out’ is somewhat compromised by association with ink cartridges and protractors.
Still, it’s more rock’n’roll than lending your visage to an upmarket brand of golf club:
4. The White Stripes – Coca-Cola
Depressingly, Jack White composed a song, ‘Love Is The Truth’, especially for this Coco-Cola ad, which only aired in Australia.
5. Gary Glitter – Heinz Lentil Soup
Take a nostalgic trip back to the days when the jump-suited one was still more “laughing stock” than “global hate figure”.
6. Lily Allen – mobile phones
Does it still count as selling out if you only appear in the ad in animated form?
7. Snoop Dogg – Orbit chewing gum
“Dirty mouth? Clean it up with Orbit Peppermint.” A rare example of a celebrity endorsement that actually makes you like the artist more.
8. Madonna and Missy Elliott – Gap
The agonising cringe-worthiness of this ad is now enshrined in legend. Bonus points to Elliott for rhyming “jeans” with, er, “jeans”. Risible.
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9. Ozzy Osbourne – I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter
Presumably where the suits at ‘Country Life’ pinched the idea from.
Amazingly, that’s not the most embarrassing product endorsement of Ozzy’s career:
10. LL Cool J – Old Spice deodorant
The veteran rapper is apparently hot property in the US endorsement market, following the success of his fitness book, ‘The Platinum Workout’.