17 fire tweets ridiculing people who think ‘Straight Pride’ should exist

Just over a year ago, a man with a gun walked into a gay club in Orlando, Florida, and killed 49 people. 58 others were injured. It was the deadliest incident of mass violence against LGBTQ+ people in American history.

The massacre took place on June 12 – towards the start of Pride Month – and it was in the fresh memory of this horrific tragedy that some laughable Twitter users recently got the hashtag #HeterosexualPrideDay trending on Twitter. Theirs was the dunce’s perennial shower-thought: ‘If there’s Gay Pride, why isn’t there Straight Pride?’

Pride started in 1970 to mark the anniversary of the watershed Stonewall riots of June 1969, which kickstarted the gay liberation movement in the USA. These days it’s both a celebration of progress, and a display of solidarity against continuing instances of oppression: in the USA there are several states where you can still be fired from your job for your sexuality, not to mention the 10 countries where you can still be executed for it.

Our Prime Minister, Theresa May, once voted against the repeal of Section 28 and against gay adoption; in 2013, when May was Home Secretary, the UK Border Agency that she was in charge of put gay asylum seekers through the humiliation of having to provide filmed evidence of themselves having sex to prove they were gay, and therefore ‘deserved’ asylum. This year she did a deal with the Democratic Unionist Party to hold on to power after the Conservatives’ disastrous election, despite the DUP’s opposition to gay rights – in Northern Ireland gay marriage is still not legal. Pride exists because it is necessary.

This weekend (July 8-9) Pride hits London, with more Pride events scheduled across the UK over summer. To mark the occasion, here’s some legends on Twitter jabbing at to the totally flawed idea of Straight Pride – in many different ways.

1. Sarcasm

2. Righteousness

3. Incredulousness

4. Ridicule

5. Sarcasm 2.0

6. Real-talk

7. Dudley-isms

8. Disingenuous sympathy

9. Double-standards-shaming

10. Surrealism

11. “Do not compare yourself to me: you are not on my level”

12. Seriousness

13. The ‘If Straight Pride existed’ argument

14. Family Guy comparisons

15. Meanness

16. Irony

17. Argument-ending thoughts

Thanks for joining us on this warm tour of Twitter comedy. Have a lovely Pride, everyone.