The fringiest singer in pop is about to turn of age. He’ll be 18, which means he can do whatever he wants with the reported $85 million he’s worth. It’s still his birthday though, so we rummaged through Justin’s old interviews for gift ideas.

1‘The Complete Dream Book’
HE SAYS: “I dreamt about blackness because I don’t dream. I just fall asleep, see black, and wake up.”
WE SAY: Poor Bieber-no-dreams. Hopefully this title will help his escape the void, and unlock the secret to his psyche. Or something.

2‘Politics for Dummies’

HE SAYS: “I’m not sure about parties, but whatever they have in Korea, that’s bad.”
WE SAY: OK, so he didn’t know what ‘German’ was (the interviewer had a funny accent, apparently, totally not Justin’s fault). But he should at least know that there are two Koreas.


HE SAYS: “I don’t style it. I just blow-dry it and”—he pauses and tousles his hair—“kind of shake it.”
WE SAY: Far be it from us to suggest haircare to the King Of Fringe, but maybe a new hairdryer would be a suitable birthday gift?

4Set of mystic runes (£3.99 from Argos)
HE SAYS: Mum always brought me to church and she put me in Sunday school. When I was little, I did ‘prophetic words’ which is sort of like fortune-telling, but from God. In one of those tapes it was foretold that I was going to be the voice of the new generation.”
WE SAY: We’re not quite sure what ‘prophetic words’ are, but if you’re into wizardry (sorry, we stopped listening at ‘fortune-telling’), these handy magic stones can fit in your pocket.

What would you suggest for Justin’s birthday? Any #biebergifts you think would be perfect?

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