You really should buy this week's issue of NME. Not just because it's been edited by me, not just because it features the line "I was swinging it and it slipped" about a pig's head and a vegan, but because it's stuffed full of new music tips that the whole team here at NME have been slaving over for the past three months.
Sod all the other polls and tip sheets out in January - if you want something to pore over and actually get you excited about music in 2014, then read this.
I was supposed to pick ten bands for us to go big on in the issue, but I'm a sucker and sap so ended up doing 14 instead – and what a ragged, random bunch they are. Ranging from Chance The Rapper, who purists will no doubt say is already too big to be featured anyway, to Fat White Family (too druggy), Eyedress (too witch house), Eagulls (too northern) and Courtney Barnett (just too darn great), it's as eclectic as anything we've ever printed in a single issue of NME, I reckon.
My favourite bits in the magazine? Probably west London collective Jungle, whose photo shoot cost a whopping £2.5k and includes a gold car; Joanna Gruesome, who stick it to the indie acts they think are on the treadmill too much; and Radkey, who take us to their hometown of St Joseph, Missouri and paint one of the most vivid pictures of what it's like to be young and not rich in modern America ever.
There's shedloads more to devour too, with words on Wolf Alice, Childhood, Royal Blood, Circa Waves, The Orwells, Telegram, FKA Twigs, Chloe Howl, Vic Mensa and many, many more.
Listen to the 40 new acts you need to hear in one handy playlist below and find out more in our gallery.