Singer said that she 'beat myself up' over the tragedy
Singer-songwriter Halsey has revealed that she experienced a miscarriage while touring ahead her debut album release last year.
The New Jersey native scored reached Number Two in the US with her debut album ‘Badlands’, released in August 2015, and also hit the charts with single ‘New Americana’. She later appeared on ‘The Feeling’ from Justin Bieber‘s album ‘Purpose’.
Speaking to Rolling Stone in a heartbreaking new interview, Halsey opens up that “last year on tour I got pregnant”.
The singer recalls what was running through her head at the time: “What happens? Do I lose my record deal? Do I lose everything? Or do I keep [the pregnancy]? What are the fans going to think? What are the moms going to think? What is the Midwest going to think? What’s fucking everyone going to think?”
She goes on to describe experiencing a miscarriage in a hotel room then continuing to play a show that same day.
“It’s the angriest performance that I’ve ever done in my life. That was the moment of my life where I thought to myself, ‘I don’t feel like a fucking human being any more.’ This thing, this music, Halsey, whatever it is that I’m doing, took precedence and priority over every decision that I made regarding this entire situation from the moment I found out until the moment it went wrong. I walked offstage and went into the parking lot and just started throwing up.”
Halsey says she “beat myself up” over the miscarriage “because I think that the reason it happened is just the lifestyle I was living. I wasn’t drinking. I wasn’t doing drugs. I was fucking overworked – in the hospital every couple of weeks because I was dehydrated, needing bags of IVs brought to my green room. I was anaemic, I was fainting. My body just broke the fuck down.”
“I had a choice,” she says. “I want to be a mom more than I want to be a pop star. More than I want to be anything in the world.”
Halsey has since tweeted to thank fans for their support following the interview.
In an equally revealing recent interview, Halsey said that she tried to kill herself after being diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 17.
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