TABLOID HELL – NOVEMBER 13 2001

Plus - Jacko's scholarly past revealed, baby Spice's secret love revealed and the 3am Girls know

Michael Jackson wants his children to be educated at home.

The Sun (November 13) reports that Jackson, famous for being friends with world-renowned spoon bender Uri Geller, is afraid that his children are too special to learn in normal schools.

“I’m going to build a computer school on the grounds,” Michael Jackson explained. “How can they go into society? He’s Prince Michael Jackson. She’s Paris Katherine Michael Jackson. It would be too difficult.” Jackson is understood to believe that he benefited from his own orthodox education and feels that a similar approach will help his children, both of whom are called Michael even though one of them is a girl and one isn’t.

“Michael has always been an educationalist first and foremost,” a keen athlete said. “In his early years, he frequently held up recording sessions debating with top producer Quincy Jones over the merits of the French Baccalaureate versus the English A Level system. Michael was always caught. On the one hand he enjoyed the freedom the French system afforded – he especially liked the philosophy element that was, and still is, compulsory. However, he also sees plusses in the specialisation aspect of Advanced Level in the UK that allows those with a love or particular bent for a subject to focus. The arguments disrupted much of the recording of ‘Off The Wall’.

“It’s a little known fact that Michael studied medieval English as a young scholar. He got close to his doctorate but had to stop in order to make the video for ‘Thriller’. He still talks about setting Beowolf to music. ‘Invincible’ is a veiled reference to that particular work. Michael believes he can be a good teacher to both his son Michael and his daughter Michael. He’s also a keen geologist and botanist.”

. We also think people should buy her singles and her albums. Maybe, as a mark of goodwill, people could buy two copies of the album each. She rings each and every fan who purchases a copy to thank them. She will. She does great stuff like that all the time.”

The Mirror’s three girls today have their photograph taken with Westlife, who they know very well because they do.

Email Tabloidhell@nme.com. Or click here if you know Westlife really well.