September 25, 1999 19:38

ON THE COUCH WITH LAETITIA FROM STEREOLAB

'Lab chanteuse on life, love and everything...

Which song describes you best?
"I can't think of a song but the name Tricky because I am inherently tricky! Not on purpose, but I am. If I'm ever arrested or anything, I always get away with it. Whenever we go through customs, I sit at the front and put the right face on and we're straight through! It's quite useful!"

What is heaven?
"A good rooftop. In Paris, they have a lot of good rooftops. I wish there was more of a skyline in London - it'd be nice to have higher buildings."

What is hell?
"I think probably Woodstock 1999. Someone we know said there were very, very nasty vibes. It was violent and there was rapes going on... nobody had a good word to say about it."

What's your earliest memory?
"Coming out of my mother's womb."

What is your greatest fear?
"I think the irredeemable is my greatest fear - something you lose forever and something that changes."

Who is your all-time hero?
"When I was in New York I was watching a documentary about a woman called Dylcia Moralles - a Puerto Rican woman who's been in prison since the '70s. The American government had tried to steal all the Peurto Ricans' land and encouraged all the women to be sterilised and stuff. This woman and her husband fought against it and they got 75 years in jail. Moralles said they weren't terrorists, they were prisoners of war. But even now she is still very clear that she is in jail for a worthy cause - fighting American imperialism."

What's the worst trouble you've been in?
"When I was about eight years old. See, we're Catholic and when you get baptised, you have these sugar-coated almonds called dragees that are gorgeous and you keep a bag of those aside which you whip out ten years later for your confirmation. So my little sister got baptised and she must have been about three when I found the dragees in the cellar. Within days, of course, I ate them and the whole family found out!"

Who was the first love of your life?
"My science teacher when we lived in America. I was 11 years old. He was called Mr Goldfluss!"

What's your greatest talent?
"Flossing my teeth! You have to have the courage to do it every night."

On whom would you most like to exact revenge?
"No-one at the moment. Revenge is a terrible thing. I could say I wanted revenge on Bill Clinton and Tony Blair because I fucking hate them and they really do ruin people's lives, but revenge really doesn't make anything progress."

What's your most treasured possession?
"Myself. That's the only thing I really possess."

What have you most regretted doing while drunk?
"What I regret most is waking up the next morning."

What can you cook?
"Anything of my own creation. I love cooking. People usually rate me as a cook, too!"

What's the best piece of advice you've received?
"Ban nothing, question everything."

What would you do if you were invisible for a day?
"I'd probably walk around naked!"

What are your final three wishes?
"I want people to opt for real democracy, my son Alex to live a long and interesting life and I'd like the NME to cut the crap!"

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