Tabloid Hell: Robbie to tackle Beckham's Rudebox?

Silly season not so much stepped up a gear as clamped on another afterburner today (August 6).

Cripes! The tabs are reporting the hot, hot news that new Los Angeles resident David Beckham may be performing alongside Robbie Williams – as one half of a very trendy gay couple indeed.

Apparently the makers of 'Desperate Housewives' want Goldenballs and the ex-Take That man to bunk up for an episode of their show, and are confident Beckham’s up to the challenge.

However it turns out that they initially wanted an even more fitting fella to play Becks’ beau – Scientologist superstar Tom Cruise.

It really would have seen Tom doing what he does best. Acting, that is… what did you think we meant?

“David’s keen, but the obvious choice was to work with Tom Cruise,” said Desperate Housewives writer Marc Cherry, not necessarily with a straight face.

“We wanted someone who matches him in height and Britishness, so Robbie is the one,” he continued, possibly holding his fingers crossed behind his back.

“They’re both funny, game for a laugh and ridiculously macho, so it should work wonderfully. The English are pitch-perfect for sending themselves up.”

We hope the pairing comes into fruition – after all this hype if it turned out to be just the papers making a story out of nothing that would be, well, a real bummer.