NME.COM

35 funniest quotes of 2010

  • On ambition: "I try to compete against the past. Michelangelo, Picasso, the Pyramids." (Kanye West)

    Photo: Press

    Added: 12 Nov 2010

  • On brand extensions: "I could launch a range of yoghurts. If I did a yoghurt it would probably do really well because everyone would be like 'Fucking hell, Example's got a yoghurt.'" (Example)

    Photo: Press

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On wearing fur: "I'm not saying, 'Let's go and kill all the polar bears and the freaking Bengal tigers.' What I'm saying is that they're freaking minks which are, at the end of the day, rodents, and there are tons of them." (Kelis)

    Photo: Press

    Added: 05 May 2010

  • On threesomes: "I had the one good threesome ever with Billy Corgan and a stylist in '97." (Courtney Love)

    Photo: Pamela Littky /NME

    Added: 19 Nov 2010

  • On Rick Rubin: "Thanks to Rick Rubin for teaching us how not to produce." (Matt Bellamy, Muse)

    Photo: Dean Chalkley/NME

    Added: 18 Jun 2010

  • On Muse fans: "The problem with touring with Muse was that all their fans were really ugly." (Robbie Furze, The Big Pink)

    Photo: Matt Salacuse/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On Jedward: "I know they still have a great career ahead." (Louis Walsh)

    Photo: Rex

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On clubbing: "We've never been to a club once in our lives. The closest we've been is standing outside selling drugs to people going in." (Ethan Kath, Crystal Castles)

    Photo: Pamela Littky/NME

    Added: 03 Dec 2010

  • On the new Strokes album: "There was one track I heard that sounded like it was underwater and seemed to have fish sounds on it, but I was also on mushrooms at the time, so who knows?" (Adam Green)

    Photo: Dan Dennison/NME

    Added: 06 Dec 2010

  • On bosses: "I'm nobody's fucking boss. I don't have a fucking boss so I wouldn't want to be one of them... Everyone can kiss my fucking ass. I used to have a boss... You know what that guy does now? He fixes the fence on my farm." (Caleb Followill, Kings Of Leon)

    Photo: Andy Willsher/NME

    Added: 17 Aug 2010

  • On The Drums: "When I see bands like The Drums being fawned over, it makes me feel ill. There is literally no soul in that band." (Nicky Wire, Manic Street Preachers)

    Photo: Dean Chalkley/NME

    Added: 14 Sep 2010

  • On sexual fantasies: "I had this dream once, but my cat woke me up before I fucked Kurt Cobain." (Akiko Matsuura, The Big Pink/ Comanechi)

    Photo: Matt Salacuse/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On getting older: "If you look down and your pubic hair's grey you don't really think, 'Great!'" (Wayne Coyne, The Flaming Lips)

    Photo: Dan Dennison/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On Coldplay: "Can I get super-passionate, can I get a boner for them, can I get an orgasm listening to them? No." (Bret Easton Ellis)

    Photo: PA

    Added: 24 Nov 2010

  • On wealth: "I'm rich enough now to have you killed." (MIA)

    Photo: Magnus Alke/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On NME: "I never read NME in a world where Nuts and Zoo exist. A magazine full of boring words and photos of miserable long-haired dickhead bands who think they're cool 'cos one of them wears a tie and the other one can play a violin." (Jay, The Inbetweeners)

    Photo: Ed Miles/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On what he does in his free time: "A few weeks ago I went up to my in-laws' house. The whole time I smoked weed, did shots of tequila and walked around nude." (Tim Harrington, Les Savy Fav)

    Photo: Pieter M Van Hattem/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • As part of our end-of-year review we're looking at some of the year's most memorable quotes. We'll kick off with a typically modest proclamation from Bloc Party singer-turned-solo star Kele: "I think my greatest asset is my emotive sounding voice."

    Photo: James Arnold/NME

    Added: 16 Nov 2010

  • On drugs: "I saw a winged lizard ascending a spiral staircase. At the top of which was a glowing white orb... the orb was God." (Jamie Reynolds, Klaxons)

    Photo:

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On unicorns: "I find mythical animals nothing but frustrating, because they're impossible to eat." (Chris Cain, We Are Scientists)

    Photo: Dan Dennison/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On crap day jobs: "I used to work in a meat factory, putting the fillings into pies. If you saw what went into them... you'd never eat them again." (Harry Johns, Dinosaur Pile-Up)

    Photo: Emilie Bailey/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On groupies: "I was at a club, and thinking which slag would be the right one for me to take home. Don't write 'slags'. Put 'hotties'." (Giggs)

    Photo: Tom Oxley/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On going indie: "I really hope I can connect with people in the NME world." (Diana Vickers)

    Photo: Richard Johnson/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On bad habits: "I've got a scab on my stomach which I've been picking bits off and eating occasionally." (Yannis Philippakis, Foals)

    Photo: Dean Chalkley/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On band politics: "There's only room for one ego in this band, and that's mine." (Tahita Bulmer, New Young Pony Club)

    Photo: Andy Whitton/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On other bands: "I fucking loathe bands for just existing because they like what they do. Go fuck yourself! That's not a good enough reason to exist." (James Murphy, LCD Soundsystem)

    Photo: Pieter M Van Hattem/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On debauchery: "Pete Doherty said to me, 'God you're really fucked. You need to go to bed.' That was sobering." (Murph, The Wombats)

    Photo: Aaron Farley/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On musical development: "My new music sounds like Lady Gaga meets The Prodigy." (Vanilla Ice)

    Photo: PA

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On unusual pets: "My bearded dragon is not a sexy pet. It's got salmonella in its shit... He's cool though, very punk." (Plan B)

    Photo: Suzie Blake/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On weird gigs: "The last gig we played before coming to Europe was crazy. In one corner some dude was shooting up, in the other this chick was getting eaten out and in the middle people were fighting with a swing." (Mason Orfalea, Cerebral Ballzy)

    Photo: Roger Sargent/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On the financial collapse: "I'm not a fan of any bank. To me, they're all cunts!" (Liam Fray, The Courteeners)

    Photo: Andy Whitton/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On politics: "The Tories? I'd just set fire to the fuckers. I mean, they're just horrible, aren't they?! I would actually set fire to them. Every single one of them, one by one." (Tom Meighan, Kasabian)

    Photo: Tom Oxley/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • On sex: "This record is not coming-of-age, it's just cumming... it's got a lot of cock in it." (Will Rees, Mystery Jets)

    Photo: Andy Whitton/NME

    Added: 14 Dec 2010

  • "There was a fella taking paparazzi shots in Liverpool the other day and we said, 'Don't' and he went, 'Yeah, alright then, who's gonna give a shit anyway?' He was easily persuaded." (James Skelly, The Coral)

    Photo: Press

    Added: 07 Dec 2010

  • Pick up a copy of this week's special giant Xmas double issue of NME for a free 2011 wall calendar, an exclusive interview with Beady Eye and many more Christmas treats.

    Photo:

    Added: 14 Dec 2010