Poetic licence is one thing, but sometimes songwriters push their lyrics to the bounds of nonsense. Here are some of the best impossible lyrics from pop’s Dr Seusses.
Journey, ‘Don’t Stop Believin”
“Just a city boy, born and raised in South Detroit”
No you weren’t. There’s no such place as South Detroit – downtown Detroit is bordered to the south by the Detroit river, beyond which is Canada.
Carly Rae Jepsen, ‘Call Me Maybe’
Lyric: “Before you came into my life, I missed you so bad”
So you’re pining for people you’ve never met and don’t even know exist, Carly? You must miss people a lot.
Oasis, ‘Champagne Supernova’
Lyric: “Slowly walking down the hall, faster than a cannonball”
Unless said cannonball is rolling pretty slowly then you, sir, are on very strong drugs.
Adele, ‘Set Fire To The Rain’
“I set fire to the rain”
That’s a hell of a lighter.
The Tokens, ‘The Lion Sleeps Tonight’
“In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight”
While it’s not strictly impossible for a lion to be asleep in a jungle, lions actually live on the savannah, as any QI-watching fool know.
Talking Heads, ‘Once In A Lifetime’
“Remove the water from the bottom of the ocean”
You’re gonna need a bigger bucket.
Bruce Springsteen, ‘The Wrestler’
“Have you ever seen a one-legged dog making his way down the street?”
Strangely, Bruce, no we haven’t.
Starship, ‘We Built This City’
“We built this city on rock and roll”
Subsidence much of an issue round your way, by any chance?
The Who, ‘Pinball Wizard’
“He plays by sense of smell”
Let’s hope he doesn’t drive by it, too.
The Who, ‘Substitute’
“The north side of my town faced east and the east was facing south”
You’ve got the map the wrong way round, pal.
Pixies, ‘Where Is My Mind?’
“With your feet on the air, your head on the ground, try this trick and spin it, your head will collapse if there’s nothing in it”
If this were true, breakdancing competitions would be bloodbaths.