Honey To The B

So anyway, Thurston. IF I understand you correctly, what you're going to do is send out 30 different tapes with some feedback going, "Eeeeeee" on them....

SO ANYWAY, THURSTON. IF I understand you correctly, what you’re going to do is send out 30 different tapes with some feedback going, “Eeeeeee” on them. And the various bands, post-rock ambulance chasers, no-marks, left-bank artists, eggheads and beret owners you send them to are going to ‘respond’ to them are they? Right. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Oh sorry, you’re not joking, are you? Like a snowman celebrating the warm weather by commissioning a statue of himself made out of more snow, ‘Root’ is a self-aggrandising and entirely futile project. It’s the emperor’s new clothes, remixed. A salute to Thurston Moore’s abilities in the twin fields of surreal tallness and going, “Eeeeeee”, ‘Root’ has brought a bucket of gallery-opening knobheads out of the woodwork in homage. There will be an exhibition. David Bowie is involved. Jesus.

So here are 25 ‘pieces’, where the likes of Add N To (X), Mogwai, Stereolab, and Mark Webber out of Pulp add their own unique imprint to Thurston’s initial one-minute “eeeeeee”. Some howling opportunities are missed. The Blur ‘Root’ contribution should go: [I]”I’ve got a lovely bunch of eeeeeeee You don’t get many of them to the eeeeeeee gor blimey gawd love the little orphans eeeeeeeee”[/I]. But sadly, it doesn’t.

Blooping, though. Plenty of fizzing, crackling and dissonant ambient drizzling, which is lovely, but somehow you wish at least one of the tracks was accompanied by wild and uncontrollable laughter.

You run to the hills. But then you find that the hills were just part of an installation art project on rural living. So it goes.