...probably not quite good enough to make you ever want to play it again...

There’s a couple of things you should know about the people in [a]7 Hurtz[/a]. One of them, Lascelles Gordon, runs a club called Helter Stupid, where they play “offal sewage for the ears”. He’s also the drummer in [a]Campag Velocet[/a]. His partner, meanwhile, is Ben Cowen – a man who likes to sit at home listening to John Carpenter soundtracks. So as you can imagine, when they get together, it’s quite a party.

‘Audiophiliac’ is like watching [I]jam[/I] stripped of all dialogue. It’s 50-odd minutes of sparse, pulsing electro that sounds like it was recorded in an abattoir. Debut single ‘Beatbox’ was apparently a dancefloor smash. As it sounds like an army of amplified ants burrowing into your brain, you have to wonder what clubs we’re talking about. Not ones where you’re expected to dance, obviously.

Still, it’s not all bad. In fact, largely it’s just sinister and minimalist. High points include a track called ‘Brains Diagram’ (good title) and the dark, labyrinthine conclusion of ‘Babe’ – which really does sound like the soundtrack from Carpenter‘s [I]Assault On Precinct 13[/I]. So that’s good. Although probably not quite good enough to make you ever want to play it again.