December 8, 1999
Church, Charlotte : Just wave hello
Much of it is in Latin, so maybe a bit got lost in the translation. Classical, eh? Too quiet and you can't hear the words...
Charlotte Church must feel like the child who is forced to stay indoors on Christmas Day and play 'chopsticks' on the piano for semi-comatose relatives before opening her presents of a 5,000-piece jigsaw and some fucking mittens, before having to help her mother make bread pudding, when what she really wants to be doing is having a virtual snog-up with Jobrick from Cum On Feel The Boyz but she can't because she's a good girl.
But until the day she finally rebels and formsCharlotte Church and The Cocking Castratos she'll have to continue affecting a singing accent that sounds half Austrian with a South African lilt, backed by a chorus from the singing mice off of Bagpuss.
This delightful number is subtitled 'Ford Global Anthem'. But instead of the words being "Buy more Ford cars", the message is, roughly, that mighty Satan's hour is close at hand, heed ye O wise men of the scorched earth for ye who hath cowered and fawned at the foot of the Nazarene shall be engulfed in the towering flames of the Dark Lord's wrath when he returns to claim his unholy birthright. But please, don't have nightmares, and do sleep well. Although much of it is in Latin, so maybe a bit got lost in the translation. Classical, eh? Too quiet and you can't hear the words...
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