Show Your Hand
Poker: sport of kings, drunkards and fools, only ever played by illogically optimistic alcoholics with staggering debts. Obviously this writer is brilliant at it and knows that, when the chips are in and it’s time to show your hand, the music in your head is not the jolly, folksy lollop presented here by genre-straddling pop geniuses SFA – full of daisy-picking, summer fluffy-wuffiness about “Flowers wilting in the sun”. No, it’s a noise of violent desperation and savage hatred, like ‘Ride Of The Valkyries’ covered by Cradle Of Filth. Romantics, stick to this; poker fans, try ‘Stabbing A Fucker For Hitting Trips On The Turn’ by Gallows.