Top Things To Do At Glastonbury – Saturday

How are you holding up? By now you’ve probably been through at least one of the ‘big’ nights of the weekend, you’ve suffered the majority of the weekend’s rain, and got to grips with the site’s layout (and muddy flashpoints). So now it’s time to work out Saturday’s plan. You can sleep when you’re dead (although don’t die, literally, if you can. At least until Beyonce’s finished). The Beeb’s promising “white cloud with light rain forecast for 4pm” today and nothing but sun (and 26 degree heat) tomorrow. Fingers and toes crossed. Here’s some ideas – aside from the obvious stuff – to check out.

Glasto atmos

Lunchtime – Grab some free lunch at the Hare Krishna tent
I found myself in a deserted corner of the site last night, where the only culinary option was this rancid delight. Don’t get yourselves in that position – head to the happy Hare Krishna people (near the criminally underpopulated Spirit Of ’71 area) for free healthy eats.

Rank Burger

1.45pm – Listen to Ben Goldacre speak
Give your cochleas a break and exercise some grey matter at the Free University Of Glastonbury as the Guardian columnist and author of ‘Bad Science’ speaks. He deals in anti-big medicine / scientific manipulation rhetoric, exposing the pharmaceuticals and media for misusing science and medicine, but it’s a lot more interesting than that sounds.

2.30pm – Watch Toast Masta And The Oduduwa Talking Drummers
Fucking no idea who they are, but they sound fun. They’re on at the Tadpole Stage (if such a place really exists). It’s holding didge workshops this weekend too, if your didge skills need honing.

3pm – Watch Jessie J on the Other Stage
One of those mid-afternoon slots to, as the tabs say, “raise the temperature”. ‘Do It Like A Dude’ should be alright anyway.

4pm – Head to Alpines at Magic Bubbles
Highly-hyped glacial pop duo are midway through their ascent into the big league. Or medium league at least.

5pm – See YoYo take over the Hub
The London club night have moved from the late late night slot to a mid afternoon session – essential stuff.

6pm – Head to Cubehenge for some unusual noises
If you’ve found a lull in your schedule for the main stages, head to the luminescent rave corner for Gold Panda at six followed by Brandt Brauer Frick at 7.30pm. The latter might sound like a German law firm but they actually create techno tunes using classical equipment. Total Glasto booking.

Head to West Holts for the evening bands
Unless you’re a Paolo Nutini, Elbow or Coldplay fan, this might be the night to get up to Shanrgi-La and the Unfairground early. Access is blocked off along the railway line this year so you need to head in via the Cabaret Field. Get a head start by watching West Holts’ stellar line-up, from Fools Gold at 6.15pm to Janelle Monae at 9.15 and Big Boi 10.45. Both Katy B and Jamie Woon were bigging Janelle up this week.

7.45pm – Watch today’s “secret” special guests
The worst-kept secret since yesterday’s secret, Pulp play The Park at 7.45pm. Get in the area by 7, and lick your finger and hold to the wind to find out which way its blowing. Then head to an appropriate mud slick to get the best sound.

Evening – Find the Pale Blue Door
The legendary pop-up restaurant / cross-dressing sideshow is usually pretty booked up, but worth checking up on, if three course sit-down meals combined with performance art and men sporting strap on dildos is your thing. (NB: it’s better than that sounds).

Midnight – Hit the late night options running
The NYC Downlow kicks off properly with Horse Meat Disco at 12. An hour of so of remixed disco classics will set you up nicely for Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs at Campo Pequeno at 3am following by a Friendly Fires DJ set at 4. If you’re knackered, the Spirit Of ’71 cafe is showing Glastonbury The Movie at 2.30am.

And don’t forget to…

Get naked and stand on a rock.

Naked Men

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