Father John Misty Live-Tweeted This Horrible Tinder Date And It Sounds So Awkward

Father John Misty – the singer and former Fleet Fox formerly known as Josh Tillman, who in his spare time composes traumatising lullabies and takes acid with Lana Del Rey – sat in an LA bar for around two hours in March tweeting live poetry about a ‘steamy’ Tinder date he was witnessing between a superstitious lady and a guy who hates his job. It’s been done before (entrepreneur/doctor/beauty queen Carrie Mantha’s tweetathon of a car-crash date went viral on Buzzfeed in 2014) but Tillman’s analysis of the situation is full of eloquent, telling detail, and punctuation that E.E. Cummings would be proud of. Let’s dive in.

Imagine the forward-slashes as snatches of walkie-talkie white noise interspersing Tillman’s dispatches from the front line.



Tillman’s something of a cynic here, noting tactical behaviour from the guy and mystical bullshit from the girl. They meet somewhere in between with “mock accents,” which somehow make the atmosphere “very steamy.”


This bit appears very cliché, but in Tillman’s words it reads like a short, tragic poem.



Quote marks = scorn. Deserved scorn.



These two people are millennials with artistic pretensions and self-limiting insecurities. She calls herself an artist but simultaneously denies it; he is really good at his job but hates it. They sound quite like characters from Girls, which is weird, because actual girl from Girls, Jemima Kirke, is sitting at a table nearby.



Things get properly meta now, because Jemima Kirke, above (who’s Jessa in Girls, by the way), and her sister Lola are watching Tillman, who’s obviously been sitting in a bar playing with his phone for a long time. Lola tweets that she’s been watching him while he watches the couple who are watching her and her sister. She also shows good knowledge of Father John Misty’s videos and the umlaut, referencing the time Tillman got off with his doppelgänger in the video for ‘The Night Josh Tillman Came To Our Apartment’.

He’s understandably embarrassed to have been spotted doing nothing but tweet for two hours:


Right, shall we get back to the end of the story? It’s really poetic and heartwarming.