Noel Gallagher had someone in his band playing scissors last night and people are well confused – even Liam

You gotta roll with it.

Gallagher Sr. has been prone to musical experimentation of late, what with his track ‘Holy Mountain’ sounding like Tony Christie singing The Vaccines and follow-up ‘Fort Knox’ sounding like Massive Attack doing Kanye while someone uses a pneumatic drill in the background, for some reason. No-one, though, expected to tune into LaterWith Jools Holland to catch Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds performing a new song with the aid of stationary. Of course, Liam has something to say about it too.

Yes, this is the news that one of Noel’s backing musicians was spotted playing a pair of scissors as they unveiled new track ‘She Taught Me How To Fly’ on the flagship show. In the video above, the concentration on the scissor player’s face is plain to see. She’s clearly serious about her art. Yet the people of Twitter are confused.


Firstly, Liam’s not a fan…

Matt has a very simple and very pertinent question

Naoimh wants Noel to know she’s got what it takes


Holly can’t actually believe what she’s seeing

Dan has a compelling theory about all of this

Lee is heartbroken, just heartbroken #prayforlee

Graeme is undermining the scissor playing community here

Meanwhile, we all await @vulgrs’ verdict with baited breath 

The track raises all kinds of questions. For how many years has this woman trained to become a scissor player? Does she have a scissor-playing mentor or is she more of a natural? Is playing the scissors more or less complex than playing, say, the triangle? Questions upon questions, questions upon questions.

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Even more weirdly, the song itself – despite featuring a scissor player – is the most conventional NGHFB track that he’s put out in advance of new album ‘Who Built The Moon?’. It remains to be seen if the record is a bold musical innovation or simply more of the same. More pressing, though, is the issue of whether or not Liam will now take up the scissors. After all, can it be harder than mastering his favoured instrument, the tambourine?

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