Oasis V Tennyson: Where Would Noel Take These Classic Poems?

We’re listening to the newly remastered Oasis albums in the NME office today (Sorry, Liam) and thinking about the best and worst Oasis lyrics. Though Noel Gallagher knows how to pen a great verse, there’s more than a few absolute stinkers in the Oasis canon. Here’s some favourites just from ‘Supersonic’:

“You make me laugh. Give me your autograph”

“I know a girl called Elsa. She’s into Alka Seltzer”

“She’s sniffing in a tissue, selling the Big Issue”

And don’t forget:

Hey you! Up in the sky
Learning to fly
Tell me how high
Do you think you’ll go

Before you start falling
Hey you! Up in a tree
You want to be me
But that couldn’t be

Anyway, it got us thinking: what would Noel do with opening lines from classic poetry? Here’s a few suggestions to start you off – add your verses in the comments below or using #Oasispoetrymashup.

Williams Blake’s ‘And Did Those Feet In Ancient Time’

And did those feet in ancient time
Kick the face off a stupid mime
For sounding like that shite band Haim
In the sunsheyiiiine

William Wordsworth’s ‘I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud’

I wandered lonely as a cloud
In a fookin’ massive crowd
But it was way too fookin’ loud
I fookin’ hate that George O’Dowd

Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s ‘Kubla Khan’

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan a stately pleasuredome decree
‘Cause he wants to be free
Just like me
But that couldn’t be
‘Cause he isn’t me
Far as I can see
Come to mine for tea?

Over to you.