Oh, Christ, No – Susan Boyle Covers The Rolling Stones

Susan Boyle does The Rolling Stones? Ah, but which song?

‘It’s Only Rock N Roll (But I Like It)’, with its line about committing suicide live on stage (which might be appropriate, given the emotional fragility she demonstrated during the ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ live shows)?

‘Brown Sugar’, with its outre references to interracial sex, cunnilingus, heroin and slave rape?

Alas, no: she’s gone for ‘Wild Horses’, slathering it in the inevitable topcoat of Elaine Paige-style, quivery-lipped schmaltz.

All of which makes for the most appallingly saccharine cover version since coffee-table jazzer Eliza Lumley did this to Radiohead’s ‘Let Down’.