Project Natal For The XBox? I Want To Slay Zombies, Not Jump Up And Down In Front Of My Telly

It seems everyone is talking about this today; Project Natal the new development unveiled at the E3 Expo in LA this week, that takes the ‘active’ style of game playing Nintendo have propagated with the Wii a hop, skip and a jump further forward – by eliminating the use of a controller entirely.

Watch the video. One word. Skynet.

You know, it’s all very exciting, and I’m not one to knock developments in technology, especially if such developments mean I might one day get to go to the moon, meet a dinosaur, or at least do both of the aforementioned virtually via a games console. But I will say this – yes, there’s a lot of fat American children who will benefit from having to jump in the air to flip a virtual skateboard, not merely flip a button on a console controller like you might do in Skate. But I want to sit on my arse and play video games. I work hard enough. I think I’ve earned it.

If I want to kick a football, I’ll ring up my friend Nick and say, “alright mate, want to kick a football about?” and we will do for ten minutes until I’m totally out of breath and have to go to hospital. I don’t want to stand in my living room and kick air towards a motion sensor. I want to kill Super-mutants in Fallout 3, think of ingenious ways to slay zombies in Dead Rising and play with my virtual dog (sniff… mummy and daddy McMahon never let me have a real dog) in Fable 2 – all diversions from reality, all things I can’t imagine how jumping about in front of the telly will ever replicate – and I want to do all these things on my own, with Pringles in near reach, and without a smiling identikit Caucasian nuclear family egging me on…

Still, I bet Nintendo are shitting it.