The BRITs’ five most harrowingly awful moments

The BRITs 2018 are tonight, which got us thinking. Every year the ceremony brings up the Big Questions. Like in 2011, when we were wondering ‘is everyone going to do dance routines with riot police?’, and ‘why is Jessie J doing that with her face?’

With this year’s Brits imminent we thought we’d take a look at our favourite funny moments from the past.

5. Oasis in 1995

AKA the point in the evening when you’re semi-comatose, slumped over the bar thinking, ‘shots would be a great idea!’ – not the moment you should be picking up an award in front of an audience of millions. After the funny and surreal “sausages” moment, Noel scores an own goal, glibly banging on about how he’s got more money than the audience members. *A nation hides awkwardly behind the sofa*


4. Brandon Block-gate

Alleged Radio One DJ Brandon Block jumps on the stage and all hell breaks loose. Ronnie Wood fumbles like someones discovered his girlfriend’s birth certificate, Davina tries to save the day by unleashing what she learnt on the street (Streetmate that is) in the form of a “whatsyrnamemate?” and Thora Birch looks annoyed that she’s not at The Grammys. No one comes out of this one looking good.

3. Geri Halliwell’s ‘Bag It Up’

Post-Spice Girls Geri emerges from what can only be described as “a massive vagina” to perform her hit ‘Bag It Up’. Riding a pole and flanked by a load of topless dancers with shocking pink hair, she set a new low for tacky. 2011 marked her return to The Brits, but with budget cuts, she was set for a more “pared down” performance.


2. ABBA Medley (Without ABBA)


Tina Cousins! Cleopatra! B*Witched! Just some of the cut-price British pop stars involved in this end of term-like ABBA Medley (Billie Piper and Steps are also involved). You could smell the oil coming off the creaking cogs of the Brits producer who thought this was the best way to “do pop music” at the award show. Wonder how many ex-Sylvia Young pupils you can get onstage at one time? WONDER NO MORE!

1. Joss Stone Has A Nervy B

Joss got a lot of stick for speaking in an American accent during this appearance. But it wasn’t so much that she forgot where she was from, it was more that she literally forgot about any semblance of reality. Years spent chowing down on alfalfa sprouts and having yeast shakes in LA had turned her brain to mush. She forgot to wear any shoes! She wore a Ronald McDonald wig! Worst of all, she sang when no one asked her to. Gawd love her.