The best opening lines from Seth Meyers’ Golden Globes opening monologue

The comedian and late night host is the award ceremony's anchor tonight (January 7)

Comedian and late night host Seth Meyers kicked off the Golden Globes tonight (January 7) with a hilarious, on-the-nose opening monologue that didn’t shy away from the big issues in Hollywood – and the world – right now. So funny was it, we could put practically every word in this blog. Here are the lines that really stood out.

On the recent sexual misconduct scandals

“Good evening, ladies and remaining gentlemen.”

“There’s a new era under way. I can tell because it’s been this long since a white man has been nervous in Hollywood.”


“It’s time to address the elephant not in the room: Harvey Weinstein is not in the room tonight. I’ve heard rumours he’s crazy and difficult to work with. He’ll be back in 20 years when he’s the first person booed during the In Memoriam.”

“For the men in the room, this will be the first time in three months where it won’t be terrifying to hear your name read out loud.”

On James Franco

“If you haven’t seen The Deuce, it’s about Times Square in the ’70s when New York was so seedy there were two James Francos.”

On a woman not being the host

“If it’s any consolation, I’m a man with absolutely no power in Hollywood. I’m not even the most powerful Seth in the room tonight [points at Seth Rogen]. Hey, remember when he was the one causing trouble with North Korea? Simpler times.”

“They tried to get a woman to host this show, they really did. They said, ‘Hey, how’d you like to come and be judged by some of the most powerful people in Hollywood?’ And they said, ‘Hm, where is it?’ And they said, ‘It’s at a hotel.’ Long story short, I’m your host tonight.”

On Donald Trump


“We’re here tonight courtesy of the Hollywood Foreign Press —  a string of three words that could not be better designed to infuriate our president. Hollywood. Foreign. Press. The only name that could make his angrier is the Hillary Mexico Salad Association.”

And a special cameo from Amy Poehler

In a special edition of Jokes Seth Can’t Tell, Meyers provided various celebrities around the room with set-ups to jokes before they added the punchlines. The game finished with Amy Poehler, who was not playing along, accusing the host of mansplaining, saying she was “reclaiming her wine”, and then responded to Meyers’ apologies by sarcastically drawing, “Another apology, how wonderful.” What a queen.