Who’s headlining: London Grammar, MIA, Grace Jones, Plan B
Who else is playing: Silk City, Chaka Khan, First Aid Kit, Mura Masa, Thundercat
Tickets: £172, weekend camping
Aren’t boutique festivals a bit, well, 2008? With Secret Garden Party hanging up its glittertits for good last year and Bestival 2017 a waterslide-level mudbath, you might have thought that time was being called on the British summer’s costumed tomfoolery, that never again would we be treated to the sight of a field full of Noddys gyrating along to Mr Motivator’s crack of dawn exercise class. But this boutique behemoth is pulling on its sci-fi lycra catsuit, grabbing its trident and parading defiantly onwards.
Ah, the legendary parade. What’s this year’s theme? It’s circus, but we’d warn the more intrepid attendees to avoid trying to unicycle across the notoriously craggy Lulworth Estate, Dorset site, unless you’ve a certificate to prove you once scaled Kilimanjaro on one wheel.
Hang on, didn’t Bestival used to be on the Isle Of Wight? It did, but moved onto the mainland for 2017. The smaller site revived its inclusive boutique feel last year, at least in the parts of the site where the drunk Zeuses could stay on their feet.