“He didn’t deserve the demons he had”: Ariana Grande talks Mac Miller in candid interview

Ari also reminisced about her relationship with Pete Davidson

In a new and personal interview with Vogue published yesterday (Jul 9), Ariana Grande spoke candidly about a gamut of topics, from learning how to heal from trauma to the death of her ex-boyfriend, Mac Miller

During the conversation, the pop star tearfully opened up about dealing with the aftermath of the tragic Manchester Arena bombing two years ago. She also explained how her headline experience at this year’s Coachella helped remind her a lot about Miller. 

“I never thought I’d even go to Coachella. I was always a person who never went to festivals and never went out and had fun like that. But the first time I went was to see Malcolm perform, and it was such an incredible experience,” she said. “I went the second year as well, and I associate… heavily… it was just kind of a mindfuck, processing how much has happened in such a brief period.”

On the subject of her relationship with the late rapper, Grande simply described it as imperfect, revealing to Vogue that she spent most of their relationship constantly worrying about Miller. Talking about the “toxic” tweet Grande posted after their break-up, the pop star admitted it “came from a place of complete defeat”.

“People don’t see any of the real stuff that happens, so they are loud about what they think happened. They didn’t see the years of work and fighting and trying, or the love and exhaustion,” she said. 

But the ‘Thank U, Next’ singer is still in mourning. “He was the best person ever, and he didn’t deserve the demons he had,” Grande said.

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For a woman who recently turned 26 and is enjoying the most successful chapter of her career, it has also been a spectacularly, and publicly, brutal couple of years for @arianagrande. “I’m a person who’s been through a lot and doesn’t know what to say about any of it to myself, let alone the world. I see myself onstage as this perfectly polished, great-at-my-job entertainer, and then in situations like this I’m just this little basket-case puddle of figuring it out.” She laughs through her sniffles. “I have to be the luckiest girl in the world, and the unluckiest, for sure. I’m walking this fine line between healing myself and not letting the things that I’ve gone through be picked at before I’m ready, and also celebrating the beautiful things that have happened in my life and not feeling scared that they’ll be taken away from me because trauma tells me that they will be, you know what I mean?” Read the full August cover story in the link in our bio. Photographed by #AnnieLeibovitz, styled by @tonnegood, written by @robertjhaskell, Vogue, August 2019.

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Elsewhere in the interview, Grande reflected on her brief engagement to SNL comedian Pete Davidson, calling their relationship an “amazing distraction” following her split with Miller. “It was frivolous and fun and insane and highly unrealistic, and I loved him, and I didn’t know him,” she explained. 

But at the moment, Ari said she’s taking a break from love to work on bettering herself, and becoming a “stronger”, “amazing” and “fearless” woman. 

Read Grande’s Vogue interview in full here.