Billie Eilish: “I didn’t think I would be happy again – I’ve gotten to a place where I’m finally OK”

"For anybody not doing well, it will get better"

Billie Eilish has spoken again of her battles with depression, assuring fans that “for anybody not doing well, it will get better”.

The teen sensation, who’s enjoyed a phenomenal year with the success of her debut album ‘When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go‘ and the runaway single ‘Bad Guy‘, has often used her platform to open about her history with mental health issues and Tourette syndrome, having revealed that she battled self-harm and depression in her early to mid-teens after suffering a dance injury.

Now in a new interview, the 17-year-old has discussed her journey to find herself in a place where she’s “finally not miserable”.

“Two years ago, I felt like nothing mattered; every single thing was pointless,” Eilish told Elle. “Not just in my life, but everything in the whole world. I was fully clinically depressed. It’s insane to look back and not be anymore.”

When it was put to her that some may accuse her of “faking” her depression for her image, Eilish replied: “It hurt me to see that. I was a 16-year-old girl who was really unstable. I’m in the happiest place of my life, and I didn’t think that I would even make it to this age.”

Billie Eilish, shot for NME

Explaining her current mindset Eilish continued: “I haven’t been happy for years. I didn’t think I would be happy again. And here I am — I’ve gotten to a point where I’m finally okay. It’s not because I’m famous. It’s not because I have a little more money. It’s so many different things: growing up, people coming into your life, certain people leaving your life.”

In giving advice to others who may be in darkness, Eilish added: “All I can say now is, For anybody who isn’t doing well, it will get better. Have hope. I did this shit with fame riding on my shoulders. And I love fame! Being famous is great, but it was horrible for a year. Now I love what I do, and I’m me again. The good me. And I love the eyes on me.”

The singer also explained how quitting Twitter was “the best decision of her life”, after finding others’ comments to be triggering.

“I was in Europe, in one of the worst headspaces I’ve been in,” she revealed. ” That’s when I realised, ‘You know what? Bye!’ There are so many things I can’t stop, but I can delete Twitter.”

Eilish went on: “I have too much love for myself — I don’t need to see all these opinions. Shoo!”

Billie Eilish

Billie Eilish at Reading 2019

Speaking earlier this year about the mental health issues that have troubled her as a teen, Eilish said: “I was always worried about my appearance. That was the peak of my body dysmorphia. I couldn’t look in the mirror at all.”

sShe added: “Sometimes I see girls at my shows with scars on their arms, and it breaks my heart. I don’t have scars anymore because it was so long ago. But I’ve said to a couple of them, ‘Just be nice to yourself.’ Because I know. I was there.”

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