And then there were two...

And then there were two. After haemorrhaging members in recent years, culminating in the messy departure of Kelle Bryan, remaining sisters Easther and Vernie Bennett don’t seem to care.

Staring steely-eyed from the sleeve photos, they’re too busy greedily surveying Lauren and Jennifer‘s recent success. So Eternal – who once had an audience with the Pope – now want to convince us they hang more with the homies than the Swiss Guards. Hence ‘What’cha Gonna Do‘ and ‘Treat Me Like A Lady‘ steal heavily from Missy Elliott, do it appallingly, and make even Whitney‘s recent makeover seem reasonable.

Such posturing doesn’t last long. They quickly return to more familiar sappy ground on ‘I Cry Real Tears‘ and ‘Pillow Talk‘. It’s just as bad, but allowing them to run their unemotional, stage-school voices up the R&B soul-pop scales is at least their natural habitat. They still want to be sassy though, adding fake orgasmic moaning and rhythmic bump’n’grind to songs that remain as chaste as Sunday school hymns.

Hopefully sibling rivalry will soon take its course. Further downsizing can only hasten the day when two become none.

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