Voyeurs amongst us may have hoped the fragrant Mariah‘s post-breakdown album would be an epic of recriminations, tantrums and graphically reconstructed lunacy. No such luck. ‘Charmbracelet’ suggests her health was restored not by crack Hollywood analysts, but by extended exposure to rainbows. Who needs anti-depressants when you have Jesus and schmaltz?
Such is the feathery illusion created by the ninth Mariahthon. Nominally, ‘Charmbracelet’ is R&B, much like Tony Blair is nominally a socialist. The good news is that Jay-Z appears for 26 seconds. For the other 64 minutes, it’s hard to sympathise with a woman who complains to the Lord about being “stigmatized” when she’s sold 160 million records and wrote the album on a catamaran off Puerto Rico. Tragedies, all told, have been worse.