‘Cribs for Xmas Number!’ posits delusional hack
Oh my good Lord and the sweet baby Jesus too. Single Of The Year, hands down, no questions, thank you and goodnight. So spiky that if you touch it your fingers will come away bloody; so brilliantly tousled and insouciantly cool that it would make Serge Gainsbourg come over all shy and bashful, and with a truly magnificent shout-along chorus (“When I’m drunk and being an asshole/That don’t mean I’ve got no class though/Why can’t we have something going on?”) that seems almost purpose-assembled for end-of-year party scrums and bellowing into the face of someone from accounts that you’re pretending to like. With just a little luck and the gentle coaxing of Radio 1, there’s actually no reason why this shouldn’t be one of the most unlikely Christmas Number Ones since, well, Gary Jules. It’s that good, the perfect stumbling-home song for our newly around-the-clock World Of Pub. There’s absolutely no way that ‘The Wrong Way To Be’ can ever hope to match its topside, but it does OK, thundering along agreeably in a Fall-on-steroids kind of way until the chorus provides us with yet more shoutalong jollies. But it’s that brilliant A-side that’s going to be the soundtrack as baubles gleam, office ties get tied around heads, tables full of vol-au-vents get sent flying, and all is peace and love in the world.